In the last couple of weeks Prayer has been in the minds and news of Lakeland. The City Commission has been challenged on their policy of beginning city meetings with prayer. I always think it is funny that it often takes Atheists to be the catalyst for needed religious dialogue....
Chuck: Everyone calls Crystal "mamasox?" I never listen to the judges...save Simon. Lorrie: Ryan acts like an ass sometimes Chuck: Simon asks Ryan if he wants his job The Judges "save"...not again Lorrie: Judge's save! You want them to have "The Judge's Take-Back" so Lilly could come back Chuck: Evidently the group couldn't learn the song so they had to call Cook in. Wait, what are you talking about? Lilly is safe this week. Lorrie: Chuck, are you off your meds again? Chuck: I'm high on life, Lorrie. BTW, David Cook is not Mick Jagger...not even Michael Jackson or Michael Jordan Lorrie: Wonder why DC is singing this? Thought Idol winners are supposed to push their latest hit? Chuck: Why didn't the group do a song? It's a last minute substitution I tell you. Lorrie: I think DC has hair plugs Chuck: some men have no trust in their Male Pattern Baldness. Lorrie: You may be the only one who is friends with the ol' MPB Chuck: He's going to Africa? Wow, everyone gets to go to Africa: Geldof, Bono, and Cook Wait...is it a superband in the making? Lorrie: only if you add Sebastian Bach in the mix Chuck: Bach? Hasn't he been dead for a 2-300 years? Lorrie: Dude, he was in the supergroup with The Nuge! Chuck: The Nuge? The old Domino's pizza character? Lorrie: You're starting to irritate me. The Noid...that brings back memories of a summer spent babysitting three kids who had a gigantic, blow-up noid and I had to blow-up by hand- er, mouth. Chuck: You were supposed to Avoid the Noid Lorrie: I would have, but he had a slow leak, thus requiring a great deal of attention Chuck: 1st idiotic Ford commercial of the season! Lorrie: oh, how I've missed the Ford commercials. Not. Casey faked the flu so as not to humiliate himself in that commercial. Nice move, Casey Chuck: Wow, watching singers have others use photoshop...exciting TV! Lorrie: Bottom 3...are you feeling lucky in your predictions? Chuck: Yeah, I want a paint job "designed" by an AI loser. PAIGE in bottom 3 YES! Lorrie: Well, I'm not upset that Paige Miles is in the bottom 3, even though I didn't pick her. Chuck: Lee is safe Lorrie: agreed Chuck: I forget who I picked...but Paige, and Andrew had to be 2 of them Lorrie: We both picked: Katie, Andrew and Tim. Chuck: ok Lorrie: Paige was your #4. SIOBHAN! My girl! Ryan speaks of Adam Lambert as though he's been successful. He hasn't. He's just been obnoxious. Woohooo! Siobhan is safe! Chuck: Siobhan is no Adam Lambert. Adam Lamert IS the lead singer of Dead or Alive reincarnated....yes, even though Pete Burns isn't dead. Lorrie: The Davenport Denier is safe! Chuck: As long as 12yo girls can vote...Aaron is safe Lorrie: well, crap. Already, we're both wrong again Chuck: Andrew...please...I am comfortable with both of them leaving. Damn. I am wrong this week Lorrie: Tim, take a seat and pass the dutchie to Paige...you both need it. Chuck: Who is singing? They have an Orthodontist on stage this week? Lorrie: no comment. Chuck: Katie in the bottom 3 next? Lorrie: Good Lord willing and the creek don't rise! Chuck: Ah, I am in the South. Commercial. I am buying a Toyota...and giving it to the person I just purchased a huge life insurance policy for... Lorrie: LOL Chuck: Paige is sitting in Andrew's chair. I was saying "WTF!" That's a quote from Paige. She doesn't look like an orthedontist Lorrie: how many different ways do you plan to spell orthodontist this evening? Chuck: The advantage of being able to edit after Lorrie: lol I think Orianthi (sp?) is the chick who was supposed to be on Michael Jackson's tour. Chuck: This just in...she was Michael Jackson's orthodontist. Well, that's kinda what my dear wife just said. She got that outfit from Joan Jett's closet. Speaking of Joan Jett's closet..... Lorrie: Catherine confused orthodontist and guitarist? Chuck: lol...evidently the confusion is my "attempt at humor." She auditioned with MJ? Lorrie: Oh, the confusion also was my attempt at humor. We really suck at humor tonight. Chuck: Speak for yourself. I really liked the Noid/Nuge juxtaposition. Chuck: Did she have to beat MJ at HORSE? Lorrie: I think she just had to bring Oxycontin as payment. Lorrie: ewww, too soon? Lorrie: On the next break, Ryan will play Suck, Suck Goose with the bottom three. They all suck as contestants. Chuck: lol Duck DUCK goose Lorrie: ...maybe in YOUR world. Chuck: and welcome to it. CSox is safe. She was upset watching her dad? Obviously, do not watch the tape of death before singing Lorrie: Sit down, Dirtysox, you're all good this week. I like how she's setting the record straight again. Girl's got a backbone on her! Chuck: Ryan should never ever go off script. Stevens is safe???? Lorrie: Katie...stand up and walk it on over to the bottom three. I don't CARE what Ryan is doing with the order! Chuck: I bet it's Lacy...If it is Casey...I'm ok with that Lorrie: Refrigerator Mike the Boy George impersonator could be the #3 Chuck: Kara & Randy switched places? Casey & Lacy? and it will be Casey? Lorrie: Did Michael Lynche even perform last night? BWAHAHAHA! Chuck: lol good one! I love the people. I was thinking the same joke as Ryan...shoot me Chuck: Why is Lacy wearing a weight lifting belt? Lorrie: she needs it for stability to hold up that huge-ass flower in her hair. OK, real quick: who's going home? Chuck: Paige or Tim and neither will be saved Tim Lorrie: I say Tim. Lorrie: Save that Save this week, judges. Lorrie: Holy Crap. Damn! Chuck: The "Vote for the Worst" group is kicking ass this year Lorrie: LOL. No kidding. Maybe he really WILL get to sing "pass the dutchie" next week. Chuck: They will not save either Lacy or Paige even though Simon thinks Paige is worth saving Chuck: I really hate watching commercials. Can we do this 10pm to 11pm next week? Lorrie: No. Chuck: Lots of room for negotiation. Thanks. Lorrie: Just call me The Negotiator. Chuck: You don't look like Jackson or Spacey Lorrie: DiDi reminds me of Brooke from last season. Or whenever she was on. Chuck: She is supposed to...with some Megan thrown in Lorrie: Kesha? Chuck: Who is that singer? She is wearing Siobhans boots. she is Pink sans talent. Lorrie: She tries to sound kind of like Fergie. Only suckier. Chuck: Forget Tim, Paige, and Lacy...vote her off Lorrie: She tries to look like Lady Gaga, only trailer trashier. Chuck: OH god...white rappers...THAT'LL make it better Lorrie: Who the hell are those two losers? Now Kesha is channeling The Village People? Chuck: If I was on stage with her, I'd demand one of those TV heads myself. Oh, she's edgy..she kicked a tv...a well prepared faux tv Lorrie: It's a sad day when blah blah blah can be words in a song. Chuck: They're roommates? Someone is getting more room tonight! I always look for the sunny side. Lorrie: rah rah ah ah ah, on the other hand, now THAT's some lyrics I can dance in my car to. Chuck: boring boring boring. Of course. It's Lacy Lorrie: gawd. this irritates me to no end. Chuck: Anyone following at home...choose the opposite of what I pick Lorrie: They won't use the save. Of course, we've already established that. Chuck: They will not save Lacy They're not even listening Lorrie: Oh yeah, judges, gather 'round for the obligatory huddle, even though you know you're not saving Lacy. Chuck: Katie is singing along...does that mean she is eligible to be sent home? Lorrie: My husband just pointed out that Lacy looks like Liza Minelli Chuck: Lacy is too much like Didi who is too much like Sibhon who is too much like Crystal...to save. Your husband is old. I would have said she looks like Judy Garland because I am, well, old. Chuck: Please send Katie home so she will stop crying at the end of every show Lorrie: Katie needs her binkie and her pacifier. It's gonna be a long night for her. I bet Lacy could sing Lucinda Williams-type music really well.
Every journalist has a dark secret. For Lorrie Delk Walker and myself, it's American Idol. Say what you will, but we like to watch and complain. A couple of years ago we wrote a series of columns for Lorrie's site. This year, we decided to capture a chat as we watched from our respective homes...
"But they're not real Christians!" The group was surprised mostly because of the abrupt exclamation of his statement; it was so matter of fact. The words were uttered with such assurance that you would have thought he was stating a prophetic proclamation. I couldn't tell if the group silence that followed was a moment of contemplation, agreement or bewilderment.
Eligible residents of Bartow, Dundee, Frostproof, Haines City, Lake Alfred, Lake Hamilton and Mulberry who want to vote in their April 6th City Elections or who desire to change party affiliation must do so by March 8th. “It is important to complete your registration by March 8th,” said Lori Edwards, Polk County’s Supervisor of Elections “any person submitting a form after that date will not be eligible to vote in the City Election.” You can download a voter registration form at www.polkelections.com. Your always-helpful public library has forms on hand. Each city hall and numerous local businesses have copies, but a visit to the library is fun for the whole family. If you're already registered, you can use the opportunity to update your information with the election office. For further information regarding the Book Closing deadline or any other election related questions please contact the elections office at 534-5888.
Normally I do not get political with my Religion in the City column. The articles are supposed to challenge and be an inspiring muse in people’s spiritual life. It has never been my intention to write to the left or right in either our community’s churches or government. I do not stand on the side of pro-lifers any more than I speak for pro-choicers. My articles are meant to be mindful expressions on the side of love, grace, hope and dignity for all of God’s children.
Pay your real estate and tangible property taxes today and the Polk County Tax Collector will give you a 1% discount. Of course, since the offices are closed, you'll have to pay through www.PolkTaxes.com by 11:59 pm February 28, 2009. But, wait, there's more! You can walk-in to one of the Polk County Tax Collector's Offices tomorrow and get the 1% discount. You have to get there before 5 pm. Yes, there's a deadline after the deadline. For more information, call (863) 534-4721... on Monday. They're closed today.
Sitting at Mitchells coffee house earlier this week a friend asked me if I thought Wesley’s sanctuary was still a sacred space, even though they have stripped away its pews and so much of the sanctuary? Of course I said yes! But it got me thinking about what I felt makes a space sacred?
I remember how large and cold the cathedral space felt as compared to the small protestant churches I was used to. My girlfriend at the time had dragged me to a large old Catholic church for what she said was her favorite religious holiday—Ash Wednesday. It is not that the Methodist or Lutheran churches which I was used to attending did not celebrate Ash Wednesday; she just felt that the Catholics did it best!
When it comes to the site of a proposed high speed rail station in Polk County, we’ve heard from the Florida Department of Transportation, the City of Lakeland, the University of South Florida Polytechnic and now a landowner on the corridor. Below is the full text of a press release from the WIlliams Acquisition Holding Company. [...]
Metro I4 News makes it easy for you to see all of the ads from last night's Super Bowl. You can watch them in one shot, scroll to find one you missed, or search for a specific ad. Careful, there's a 14 minute Chevy Chase ad in there...
This week a new mother in one of my programs asked me what I thought she could have done to deserve God making her continually depressed. As we sat and discussed her recent bout of depression since the birth of her daughter, it became abundantly clear that the woman was suffering from postpartum depression.....
Mrs. Rich simply refused to enter the reception hall of the Church’s Homeless Outreach Program. The 73 year old matriarch of the church was willing to prepare cookies, give her loose change to the cause but always simply stated she did not want to have to see or smell the homeless the program was [...]
POLK COUNTY COMMISSION – DISTRICT 2 This district covers the southern half of the county including the cities/towns of Bartow, Fort Meade, Frostproof, Highland Park, Hillcrest Heights, Lake Wales, and Mulberry, as well as areas of southern Lakeland. The winner will replace Republican incumbant Randy Wilkinson, who is term-limited. — DEMOCRAT — Jacquelyn Smith: (Lakeland /Retired Federal Employee; Real [...]
GOVERNOR The winner will replace Republican incumbant Charlie Crist, who is running for the U.S. Senate — DEMOCRAT — Joe Lancelot Allen: (Key West / Retired Teacher) - Campaign Web Site - Michael E. Arth: (DeLand / Landscape & Urban Designer, Author) - Campaign Web Site – Facebook Page - Phillip J. Kennedy: (Crestview) - This candidate currently has no online [...]
Bio: Chris Craig received his Master’s in Social Work from Tulane University and his Master’s in Pastoral Care & Counseling from Garrett Seminary. Chris guest preaches, leads spirituality classes, and works in social services in Lakeland. Chris is not ordained in any church, and his columns do not speak for any churches or organizations where he might be affiliated.