Beginning in February 2010, Polk Vision has been in the process of conducting a comprehensive revision of the original priorities and strategies developed in 2004 which we are calling “Polk Vision Refresh.” We have been gathering community input through focus groups, social media communications and surveys.

During the months of July and August, each of the six areas of focus task forces (Education, Economic Development, Infrastructure, Quality of life, Government and Private Sector Leadership) will conduct open meetings to revise the strategies contained in the original Polk Vision document.

Interested parties are encouraged to participate in the task force meetings either in person or via webinar (more information on webinar hosting sites will be released in July).

July 12 – Quality of Life
July 14 – Economic Development
July 19 – Infrastructure
July 20 – Education
July 21 – Private Sector Leadership
August 2 – Government

Time: 5:30 – 7:30 p.m.
Location: LTB Auditorium at the PSC/USF Poly campus
3433 Winter Lake Road, Lakeland, 33803

photo illustration credit: Jon Smith

Chuck: She’s early

Lorrie: Praise the Lord, and as Madea would say, “Halleluyer.”

This thang is almost over!

Chuck: Hey…a Mississippi Gulf Coast commercial.
7:59 PM
Where’s “Catch your own oil!”

Lorrie: Eyes front, Welch. No blogging about commercials.

Chuck: The Governor and 1st Lady have one hell of a Mississippi accent. Wow.
8:00 PM
Lorrie: Hey..question for you: why are we doing these chats and then you don’t post them on MI4?

MI4, even?

Chuck: I’ve just heard the rumor that both Simon and Randy predicted last week that Lee would win.

DAMN!

I thought I did.
8:01 PM
Well, if our reader doesn’t tell me I messed up…then I don’t check

Lorrie: Here’s your reader telling you that you messed up.

Chuck: Now you tell me

I’m busy now
8:02 PM
\I’ll forget in 2 hours

Wow

Taylor Hicks is in the house

Lorrie: Did you see Taylor Hicks?

Chuck: lol

How many words a minute do you type?
8:03 PM
Lorrie: I just bought his CD at a yard sale for 50 cents. And I type a lotta WPM. Just not as many as you with your four fingers, apparently.

Chuck: Kara should have worn a suit and Ellen a dress.
8:04 PM
Lorrie: WTH?

Chuck: Why are they dressed in boarding school clothes?

Lorrie: school of rock costumes!

Chuck: lol

Jack Black is in the house!
8:05 PM
Lorrie: If there is one person on this earth who positively cannot rock the school girl look, it is Crystal.
8:06 PM
Andrew is back. Good thing, because so is Paula.

My girl Siobhan!

Chuck: Siobhan is going for the “I’m getting suspended” look.

Lorrie: It’s the Alice Cooper dancers!
8:07 PM
Chuck: Alice Cooper? We have a new “jump the shark”

Why is my grandfather singing “school’s out?”

Lorrie: This is the kick-off for Alice Cooper’s AARP Summer Tour. Sponsored by Geritol.

Chuck: lol
8:09 PM
The other Ford Fiesta commercial is better.
8:12 PM
Lorrie: Who’s Chris Allen?

Chuck: Kris Allen sings The Truth

and Ryan’s mic is still on

Way to go AI
8:13 PM
Lorrie: Did Kris really make it big? I’ve not heard anything about him.

Chuck: Kris Allen was a finalist last year. The one with singing talent as opposed to performing talent.

Lorrie: OK, but will he French kiss a guy onstage tonight?
8:14 PM
Chuck: He’s better now than this time last year.

He will, but the guy is Simon.

Lorrie: Are you sure that won’t be Simon and Ryan?

Chuck: What, you expect them to go public after all this time?
8:15 PM
Note: a better joke: “He will, but the guy will be Ellen.”

Lorrie: Yeah. Let’s use that one in the version you post. If you post a version at all…

Chuck: And there she goes again

How did we do the year you were the one who had to post?

Hmm.. did we make it 3 episodes?
8:16 PM
Lorrie: no, we did it the whole season. The second season we did it, I bailed.
8:17 PM
Chuck: uh huh
8:18 PM
Lorrie: Look at Ryan dancing like a white boy.
8:19 PM
Chuck: Siobhan is singing and reminding america they blew it.

Lorrie: amen

Chuck: I am so glad Ricky Minor isn’t arranging next year.

It’s 2/3 of the Bee gees

Lorrie: The living brothers’ Gibb!
8:20 PM
Chuck: Is that the Be Ge ?

Lorrie: Barry can’t hit that high note like he used to.

Chuck: Who would have guessed Robin would age the best?
8:21 PM
Lorrie: Barry looks scary to me. I’m going to call him BB for the rest of the night: Botox Barry.
8:22 PM
Someone Hassled the Hoff into appearing tonight

Chuck: They just showed Hasselhoff…and he’s off America’s Got Talent. You are hearing it here first: he will take over Simon’s chair!

He won’t be a judge. He is just grabbing the chair.

Lorrie: delete …delete…delete

Lorrie: actually, that was mean of me. You should delete that. Ed Note: And we did
8:27 PM
Chuck: Am I back?

Lorrie: Where’d you go? I just saw you disappear

Chuck: Michael has lost it

Lorrie: I love Michael McDonald. His voice is still pretty good.

Chuck: oooh you are suddenly kind
8:28 PM
Lorrie: Well, I typed waaaaay too soon. and I was wishful thinking.

Poor guy! what happened?

Chuck: He cut off his beard

They needed someone to make Mike Lynch sound good
8:29 PM
Lorrie: Taylor Hicks should’ve come up and performed with him.

I hate, HATE Dane Cook.

Chuck: Who the hell is Dane Cook?

Lorrie: A crappy excuse for a comedian.
8:30 PM
Chuck: You know, if I was that guys brother…I’d steal any money he made.

Oh god.

What a stunt
8:31 PM
That was a train wreck

Lorrie: What a horrible stunt gone horribly wrong.

Chuck: They gave the wrong idiot a mic.

Starting with Dane Cook.

Lorrie: That was a train wreck that had a tornado run through it.
8:32 PM
Chuck: Reader: in case you missed the results show…they brought on stage a bunch of fools who had tomrented Simon at auditions.

Lorrie: That was a trailer park-style tornado disaster. That had a train run through it.

Did we mention that it was BAD?
8:33 PM
Chuck: A tornado hitting that stunt would have improved it.
8:34 PM
Lorrie: Didi and Lacey.
8:35 PM
Chuck: All the women

Lorrie: Will Christina pop out of somewhere soon?

Chuck: Only if she can make it off her tour

Wait

She canceled her tour
8:36 PM
She can make it

Christina…get off your couch!

I think we’re seeing the group numbers from the concert tour.
8:37 PM
Lorrie: Thank goodness.

Clean up this mess, Christina.

Chuck: Why does the director hate closeups?
8:38 PM
Seriously? 15 seconds with the AI singers and a song by herself.

Lorrie: Christina is rocking the Princess Leah buns tonight.

Chuck: Those aren’t Leah buns

Lorrie: My bad, they aren’t Princess leah buns.

lol

Chuck: She looks like a cartoon character
8:39 PM
wait..trying to remember

Betty Boop
8:40 PM
People are getting on Christina…but I’d like to point out the names of her comtempories: Jessica Simpson and Britney Spears.

Lorrie: Christina is SOOO much better than those ho’s.
8:41 PM
Chuck: Why does she hold the mic like she’s playing trumpet?
8:42 PM
Lorrie: she’s always done that. Drives me nuts

Ricky looks like he has vampire fangs.
5 minutes
8:47 PM
Chuck: Lee is singing a good song…looks like Hall & Oates will join him
8:48 PM
Lorrie: Why can’t they just stash Andrew somewhere until it’s time to sing a Paula Abdul song?

Chuck: lol
8:49 PM
Lorrie: Big Mike doesn’t fit in. Also, he should stop dancing.
8:50 PM
John Oats has to be shorter even than Ryan

Chuck: Reader: Hall & Oates are singing and Lorrie & I are mesmerized

Lorrie: They’re the best perofrmance tonight.
8:51 PM
Chuck: Truth is: I’m watching my wife unpack an iPad.

Lorrie: what?!
8:52 PM
Is it your’s or her’s or y’alls?

Chuck: yes. not for me. Nope.

Hers.
8:53 PM
Crystal is singing “Ironic”

Lorrie: couldn’t they have had a stylist dress her dad in smething other than gay biker attire?
8:54 PM
Chuck: Well, the irony is…he isn’t a biker!

Lorrie: Alanis!

Chuck: Alanis is singing now

OMG!

lol
8:55 PM
Crystal sang “Will she go down with you to a theatre?”

Lorrie: Alanis- the world’s first woman who could sing after swallowing barbed wire and lodging a Rottweiler in her throat.

Chuck: Alanis has spray tan on tonight…oh my.
5 minutes
9:01 PM
Chuck: Alanis can’t sing alone…but Carrie Underwood can?
9:02 PM
I think Carrie has on an outfit I remember the Dead or Alive singer wearing in 1984.

Lorrie: Carrie’s jacket looks like warped vinyl records.
9:03 PM
And yes, of course Carrie sings alone. She’s a product of the Idol.
9:05 PM
Chuck: They’re giving Crystal & Lee cars….

It’s a surprise! lol…like for every other final two

Lorrie: Lame cars. And they have to pretend to be happy. Now they’re wishing they had cooled it on their designs.
9:06 PM
Chuck: Brett???

Lorrie: Brett Michaels is gonna come out on stage
9:07 PM
Chuck: on a gurney

Lorrie: lol
9:08 PM
this guy is kinda like Keith Richards. He takes a lickin’ and keeps on tickin’

Chuck: He sings about as well as he did before the hospital stay.
9:09 PM
Lorrie: I still kinda like that ol’ trashy thing. Reminds me of high school.
9:10 PM
Chuck: You went to high school with Brett Michaels?

Lorrie: This is me not commenting on that.
9:13 PM
Is this show almost over? Sheeeesh!
9:14 PM
Chuck: Does Anybody Really Know What Time it is?

Lorrie: Jersey City will be an audition site? God, now Snookie is gonna try out

Chuck: Yes, time to end this and announce the winner
9:15 PM
Lee is singing with Chicago

I remember when they were the Chicago Transit Authority.

Lorrie: Peter Cetera couldn’t hit that high note
9:16 PM
Wait…that isn’t even Peter!

Chuck: I don’t Cetera is with them any more.

Lorrie: even the horns sound “off” to me
9:18 PM
Chuck: Matt Rogers! He should won his year on Idol.

Lorrie: ohno he should not have.

Chuck: should have
9:21 PM
Lorrie: Pants on the Ground. OMG

Chuck: They’re doing Pants on the Ground live
9:22 PM
Lorrie: and all the dancers have their pants on the ground.

Chuck: This is the dance mix of the song

jesus

William Hung

Lorrie: WTF?!
9:23 PM
SWeet Baby Jesus, please tell my eyes they did not just see that.
9:24 PM
Chuck: They saw it.
9:25 PM
Lorrie: I think I need a moment to recover from this.
9:28 PM
Chuck: It’s 9:27. You owe me many moments I have lost forever.
9:30 PM
Paula is singing To Sir with Love I bet

Lorrie: And there she is!

she looks almost drug-free!
9:31 PM
Chuck: Lorrie left
9:32 PM
Lorrie is missing paula bringing back the judge as stoned.
9:33 PM
Is she back?

Lorrie: I didn’t realize I had gone away!

Here’s what you may have missed.

Chuck: Nope, she’s on drugs still.
no one in the audience even knows how to react to what she’s saying.
This is so uncomfortable.
9:35 PM
are you there?

Chuck: I am

You weren’t

I bet they have the winners sing for him

yes

I am right

Lorrie: Kelly Clarkson doesn’t even look like herself.
9:36 PM
David Cook is missing
9:37 PM
Chuck: Yes, his contract forbids him from getting 500 feet from Simon

oh god

2nd and 3rd place singers

Lorrie: Justin Guarini?!

Chuck: and more

Lorrie: All those losers were happy to get some stage time.
9:38 PM
Where’s Clay Aiken?

Chuck: Spamalot
9:40 PM
Lorrie: what the hell is Paula doing on that stage?

She looks so weird!

Chuck: Simon told her to come on stage
9:42 PM
Lorrie: 18 minutes to go…I don’t know if I’m gonna make it…

Chuck: at this point

the only person who cares who wins
9:43 PM
is Crystal & Lee

persons

Lorrie: Who’s gonna win?
9:44 PM
Chuck: Crystal
9:45 PM
Lorrie: Janet

Chuck: Janet Jackson admits her career is down the tubes

Lorrie: Miss. Jackson if you’re nasty.

Chuck: by appearing on AI
9:46 PM
Lorrie: I like her hair.

Chuck: I don’t

Finally we disagree on something this season.

Why does she need a cordless mic and an earpiece mic?
9:47 PM
Is she going to bust out dancing?

Not in that dress

Lorrie: in case she has a wardrobe malfunciton, she can drop the hand mic and cover herself.
9:48 PM
Chuck: Actually…that dress looks tearaway

Lorrie: She sounds like Michael.

Chuck: You think?

She always has

Most people don’t know she started dubbing him when he hit puberty.
9:49 PM
It’s why the Jacksons had her

They needed a girl to mimic Micaels voice

Lorrie: well, you called the breakaway dress trick

Chuck: Whewre’s Paula?
9:50 PM
She choreographed this

Lorrie: Let’s all say it together, readers: lip sinc.

Chuck: Poorly accomplished
9:52 PM
Lorrie: was that Edward Scissorhands in the background?

Chuck: Is that Robert Smith popping up on the stairs?

lol we saw the same guy.
9:54 PM
The video snippets of Lee and Crystal was understanted and well-done. AI must have hired it away

Lorrie: Lord, please don’t let Joe Cocker come out on stage.
9:55 PM
Chuck: They’re singing Richard Starkey’s most famous song

Sorry

Lorrie: OMG!!!!!!

Chuck: How could they not?

Lorrie: Here he is!

I love that man.

Chuck: He was actually good in “Across the Universe”
9:56 PM
Lorrie: Wow…He sounded like he was in pain.

Chuck: The key to still singing when you’re 65…sing at 20 like you’re 65 years old.

Joe Cocker’s secret
9:57 PM
Lorrie: I really and truly love him, but he just sang that high note like he was gargling with a mouthful of jacks.
10:01 PM
Chuck: Lee is about to pass out
10:02 PM
Lorrie: He looks like he’s crying.

Chuck: Breathe Lee

I think he has been told

told you
10:03 PM
Lorrie: Holy cow!!!

Lee wins.

Just like I called it. Before I said last night that Crystal would win, that is.

This is the perfect ending. Crystal gets to make her own album without having to try to be pop.

Chuck: Ryan just had to remind everyone that crystal is the runner up
10:04 PM
Lorrie: That’s why David Cook wasn’t on here tonight. they didn’t want to confuse the audience.

Chuck: Ryan asks Lee “How does it feel to be the American Idol”

and Lee answers “I don’t know.”

Because he didn’t win

Lorrie: Can Ryan just kindly STFU???
10:05 PM
Chuck: actually, Lee should join Chicago. They need a new lead singer.
10:06 PM
The stage manager is screaming and pointing at someone

Well, Lorrie
10:07 PM
thanks

Lorrie: It’s been fun! Maybe we’ll recuperate and do it again next season.

Chuck: lol

you are so funny

Lorrie: Think you can get this posted before next Tuesday?
10:08 PM
Chuck: I figure I can print it installments and people will think the show is on for another 4 weeks

Lorrie: lol. OK, I’m outta here.

Chuck: enjoy

Lorrie: Bye

photo credit: Samuel Judge Photography

8:08 PM Lorrie: here I am

Chuck: There she is. Readers…the police detained Lorrie and she’s a bit late

Lorrie: They got nothin’ on me. No evidence. I’ll beat this rap.
8:09 PM
Chuck: Of course, Lee is singing the Boxer again.

And again, he’s no paul Simon.

Lorrie: Are they singing 2 or 3 songs tonight?

Chuck: three songs, Ms Detained by LPD.
8:10 PM
Sorry…he’s too upbeat for the song.
8:11 PM
Lorrie: My fellow Idol watcher sitting beside me is gagging over the saliva strings in Lee’s mouth you can see when the cameras are up close.

Chuck: I would defocus my eyes after the first close-up.

Lorrie: Ellen refers to birthing Lee. Ellen don’t know nothin’ ’bout birthin’ no babies.
8:12 PM
Chuck: And that was Lorrie’s first Gone With the Wind reference of the night.

Lorrie: Notice how the camera

never mind. scratch that camera comment

I got “enter” happy on the keyboard
8:13 PM
Did it look like Crystal had braces on some of those young pictures??

Chuck: Crystal is doing Me and Bobbi McGee

Yes, she did.
8:14 PM
And you thought I was kidding when I said she had those teeth taken out to improve her voice.

Lorrie: Then how the heck are her teeth still jacked up? That’s not a good testimonial for her orthodontist.

Chuck: I just answered that.

Lorrie: sorry. I’m late, and slow in typing tonight.
8:15 PM
Chuck: Listening to Crystal it is obvious there is one artist/singer on the show tonight and her name isn’t Lee.

Lorrie: Hey, here’s an AI comment for the blog: Crystal is KILLIN’ that song tonight. Absolutely phenomenal.

again, I’m late on the commenting.
8:19 PM
Chuck: When did Morgan Freeman become the go-to voice over talent over James Earl Jones?
8:20 PM
I love how anti-government zealots trust the government databases to always have the correct data.

Lorrie: I love how you can’t resist the urge to comment about the commercials.
8:21 PM
Chuck: You won’t let me watch the show on delay….so I am forced to watch them.

everybody Hurts by Lee DeWize…so Bono can pay for that back surgery.

Lorrie: This has promise.

Chuck: ooops

REM
8:22 PM
I had a hair trigger on my goto Bono joke.

Lorrie: lol

Chuck: Lee…listening to you sing is my Everybody Hurts moment.

Lorrie: I don’t think it’s that bad.
8:23 PM
I also don’t think it’s winning material.

Chuck: The biggest change needed next season is to not allow gospel chorus backup singers
8:24 PM
also: NO OVER YOUR HEAD CLAPPING from the audience.

Lorrie: Randy Jackson’s jacket looks like what ushers wear in old-timey movie theaters.

I see they’re not listening to you.
8:26 PM
Chuck: By the way, readers…for the 2011 AI season…we’re going to need a ghost writer…. I don’t think I can do this again. You watch the show with Lorrie…I’ll add snide comments during the editing process.
8:27 PM
Lorrie: It has been kind of exhausting to blog about this this season.

hahaha…I just said blog instead of write. Make you crazy?

Chuck: Lorrie…what are you talking about? You wrote “write” check the column when it is published tomorrow.
8:28 PM
Lorrie: dang it! you and your need to have the last word…

Chuck: I don’t know what you’re talking about.
8:29 PM
Lorrie: Crystal sings Black Velvet
8:30 PM
I hate, HATE this song. It was played to death. And I hate to say it,but it’s typical coming from Crystal

Chuck: She was forced to sing it by the producers

Lorrie: I hate the dress

Chuck: Notice they didn’t give her a gospel chorus.
8:31 PM
Lorrie: They may still be waiting in the wings…

Nope. guess not

Chuck: And lousy directing

Lorrie: That end note was taken straight from the Siobhan Magnus book of tricks.
8:32 PM
Chuck: Well…31 mins before Randy said “in it to win it”

Lorrie: theres the obligatory “in it to win it” comment from Randy

Chuck: Man, you are typoing slowly.

Lorrie: dang it!
8:33 PM
Chuck: Every judge loved the song. Simon said she nailed it.

Lorrie: Did Ryan just say “Good luck, Babe” to Crystal??
8:34 PM
ewwww

Chuck: The last two songs are the two they have to release if they win…cue the “that sucked” scripts.

Lorrie: word.
8:35 PM
Chuck: By the way…I checked the “tape” and Ryan did indeed say “Good luck, Babe”

however…on super slow scan you see him catch Lee’s eye before saying it.

Lorrie: lol
8:38 PM
Chuck: Wow

They’re not doing new songs

Lorrie: WTH?

Chuck: See…I had that Bono joke too early

INSERT BONO NEEDING MONEY FOR HIS BACK SURGERY JOKE HERE

8:39 PM
This time they give Lee a group of violinists

Lorrie: This has got to be the lamest AI “first,” by not having original songs…but then again, I think of all the lame songs the past ones have been, and maybe this was a stroke of genius.

Chuck: What is a group of violinists?
8:40 PM
An “instrument” if violinists?

A “string” of violinists?

Lorrie: I’m pretty sure it’s a “gaggle” of violinists

Chuck: Well, in the front section we have a “giggle” of teenage girls.
8:42 PM
Lorrie: Lee practically just told Ellen he’s “in it to win it.”
8:43 PM
Chuck: Simon said, “you can’t outsing her, but you’re a nice guy”

well..in so many words

Lorrie: basically.

agreed.
8:44 PM
Hmmm…what will Crystal’s remake single be?

Chuck: I’m thinking… “The Boxer”
8:45 PM
Finally a disclaimer on the AT&T commercial

Lorrie: I just threw myself out of the chat room by accident. LPD was banging on the door and it startled me.
8:46 PM
Chuck: I asked them not to arrest you until after 9.

Lorrie: Cool. That gives me 15 minutes to put some makeup on for my mug shot.
8:47 PM
Chuck: BTW: on my disclaimer comment… http://mediadecoder.blogs.nytimes.com/2010/05/25/art-or-advertising/?src=busln
8:48 PM
Up to the Mountain by Crystal
8:49 PM
She’s singing alone….no string of violinists….no gospel chorus

wait

there they are

half a chorus

Lorrie: I think Crystal is going to win.

Chuck: duh

seriously?

I think?
8:50 PM
Lorrie: It’s just a hunch I have. A feeling in my spirit, if you will.

Chuck: When she had Lilly & Siobhan eliminated…it was in the bag.

Lorrie: she looks like she’s going to cry.

If she cries, it’ll be good for votes.

Cue the tears.

check.
8:51 PM
Ellen looks like she wants to cry, too.
8:52 PM
Chuck: This was the song: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Up_to_the_Mountain_(MLK_Song)
8:54 PM
Lorrie: OK crystal, shut up now. Don’t ruin it for yourself with hokey, bad jokes.
8:55 PM
Chuck: they’re doing a recap….Lee wasn’t any better in rehersal
8:56 PM
You know…Crystal sings well..but she can’t play to the camera. Lilly or Siobhan would have “performed” much better than Crystal.
8:57 PM
Lorrie: this guy singing looks like a statue

and like he’s scared to death
8:58 PM
Chuck: He’s British. He’s “understated”

Lorrie: You say understaed, I say embalmed.
8:59 PM
Chuck: Tomorrow’s two hour finale?

Do we have to live chat that?
9:00 PM
I say…no…and we sign off with out predictions…

Lorrie: Yes. On that note, I’m outty. Gonna see if I can sneak out the bathroom window and dodge the five-o.

I already said my prediction.

Chuck: Well…and I’ve been saying it every week.
9:01 PM
Lorrie: see ya.

Chuck: later

photo credit: alphadesigner

8:59 PM
Chuck: I made it
9:00 PM
Lorrie: Barely.

Chuck: Now we get to see all the home celebrations.

Just think…if Aaron had made it we could have traveled to Davenport!
9:01 PM
Lorrie: And blogged live from there!

Chuck: Ok, don’t push it

Lorrie: Welcome to American Idol’s Top 3 Results Show…also known as “Casey Goes Home.”
9:02 PM
Chuck: Maybe, just maybe, all the hype for Lee was the AI effort to get a backlash vote against him?

Lorrie: Say it ain’t so. OMG. Justin Beiber is on the show? I may not make it through the hour.
9:03 PM
Chuck: Hey, I heard 3000 3rd graders sing along with his song….you can handle 3 minutes with the volume down.
9:04 PM
Lorrie: oh all right…
9:06 PM
Casey’s hair looks stupid. He almost has a bun.
9:07 PM
Chuck: Readers…we’re suffering through 45 minutes of Ryan boring us by asking the contestants boring questions…
9:08 PM
Crystal finally talks about her diabetes…and how AI is giving her better care than she had at home

Lorrie: You’re suffering…I’m working on a press release for a client. I’ll see you at 9:50 p.m.
9:09 PM
Chuck: I bet the client is an orthodontist

Lorrie: Holy cow…how did you KNOW that?!

Chuck: Your laptop camera is on.
9:11 PM
Lorrie: BRB…I better go put on some pants.
9:12 PM
Chuck: I have absolutely no comment.
9:18 PM
Chuck: We’re watching the Casey James homecoming…they all work the same….person goes back to home town and is surprised how many people show up to cheer….plays a song…and 12 year-old girls scream…
9:19 PM
Lorrie: I predict that if Casey were to win- which he won’t- his success would mirror that of Taylor Hicks’. Flash in the pan, followed by a healthy bar-tour career. It’s better that he goes home tonight, 12-year-old girls, trust me.
9:24 PM
Chuck: Perez Hilton is now on AI. I’m leaving.
9:25 PM
Lorrie: I wasn’t paying attention, so thankfully, I missed Perez Hilton. I also missed hearing who this singing turd is. WHo is it?
9:26 PM
Chuck: Perez Hilton’s “discovery”

Lorrie: are you *hit*ing me?

Chuck: Hey….language young lady!
9:27 PM
Lorrie: I’ll wash my mouth out with soap later. Are those the people from Stomp! in the background?

Chuck: The Des Moines Touring Company
9:28 PM
Lorrie: I will go ahead and put this out there: I’ll be glad when this season is over next week. I’ve been subjected to more crappy pop music this season than I signed on for.
9:29 PM
Chuck: If….and this is a HUGE if…I ever watch AI again….we do not…do not….watch the results show live.
9:32 PM
Lorrie: Good idea
9:33 PM
Chuck: Now we get to watch Crystal go back to Ohio….she’s landing in Toledo…where they roll up the sidewalks precisely at 10

well, Crystal’s biggest fan is a screaming 20 yearold male
9:34 PM
The Mayor of Toledo looks like a weekend Harley biker.
9:36 PM
Crystal threw out the first pitch at a Mud hens game…and threw pretty well
9:37 PM
Lorrie: I’m bored.
9:38 PM
Chuck: Lee threw out the 1st pitch at a Cubs game….giving Crystal the win in that competition.

Lorrie: Still, I’m bored.
9:41 PM
where did all those people get the memo to make Lee’s shirts and signs in lime green? Now THAT’S branding.
9:46 PM
Chuck: Huh? I fell asleep when they went to Wrigley Field. It’s a common ailment in Chicago.

Lorrie: Now we know where Tim Urban got his hairstyle.
9:48 PM
Chuck: So, the Bowery Boys are his backup dancers?
9:49 PM
Lorrie: Children, please go to your preferred search engine and look up Bowery Boys.
9:50 PM
Chuck: Listen you whippersnapper! they were the bee’s knees back in the day.
9:51 PM
Lorrie: Are you auditioning for a Geico commercial?

Chuck: I am seriously watching a commercial that speaks about a bra you can wear 7 ways and I am completely waiting for the punch line.

And it never came….
9:53 PM
Lorrie: Huh? Wha? I nodded off again.
9:54 PM
Chuck: Finally…they start telling us what happened last night….since we’ve all fallen asleep for the last 53 minutes
9:55 PM
1st in next week’s finally….Lee

That means Casey is gone

Lorrie: definitely

Chuck: They give Lee the 1st one in to make you think he had the most votes…

Crystal asks “Am I safe?”
9:56 PM
Lorrie: Buh Bye, Casey.

Chuck: when Ryan says she is joining Lee

Well, you get to hear Casey ruin “Daughters” again.

I’m out.
9:57 PM
Lorrie: Bye!

photo credit: RageZ

Chuck: Hello
7:59 PM
Finally, the final three: Lilly, Siobhan and Crystal

Lorrie: what up? Casey gets voted off tonight. Just thought I’d throw that out there…not that it’s earth-shattering, surprising news, mind you
8:00 PM
Chuck: Casey? who’s that

Lorrie: He’s not the next American Idol, that’s who.
8:01 PM
Chuck: Lilly!!!
8:02 PM
Siobhan!!!

Each contestant sings two songs….
8:03 PM
One chosen by the contestant and one by the judges

Casey picked some country song no one has head of…

Lorrie: Losers go first…Casey, please take the stage.

Losers, even

Chuck: heard even
8:04 PM
“OK, it’s alright with me”

More like, “OK, this song sucks.”

Lorrie: More like, “OK, I’m not gonna win this thang, so why bother?”
8:05 PM
Chuck: Reader…in case you’re wondering…your daughter has decided Casey is leaving tomorrow night.

Randy is setting him up for “That sucked.”

8:06 PM
Lorrie: Ellen is saying Casey should have “brought it.” He’s NOT GOING TO WIN. He knows that.
8:07 PM
Chuck: Simon is wrong…salad leaves a lasting effect for some people.

Yes, we’re talking about food. No one wants to talk about that song.

Lorrie: Casey is pretty to look at, but did I mention that he’s NOT GOING TO WIN?
8:09 PM
Chuck: The Ford commercial…sans AI contestants, was pretty good.
8:11 PM
Crystal is doing a Bob Dylan song?

Comne to My Window by Melissa Etheridge
8:12 PM
She’s trying to back it off a bit in the opening
8:13 PM
Lorrie: Did you know that Crystal has congenitally missing cuspids?

Chuck: Did you know that she had them removed to improve her diction?

Lorrie: LOL
8:14 PM
Gentle Readers, this portion of the MI4 American Idol blog is presented to you tonight by Dr. Keith Hilliard, Lakeland .orthodonist
8:15 PM
Chuck: You can look for the expose of Dr. Hilliard’s practice next week on Lakeland Local.

Lorrie: LOL

Hey, let’s talk about AI. I’m not wowed by Crystal’s performance.
8:16 PM
Chuck: I think they’re all hanging back for the 1st song

Lorrie: apparently

Chuck: It’s like a bicycle race…no one wants to be in the lead for this race.
8:19 PM
Those wondering … I’m not sure what happened to Lorrie this week. I hope she’ll join us before the end of the show. She’s already missed Lilly’s stirring rendition of Subterranean Homesick Blues.
8:20 PM
Lorrie: It’s that a book by Jack Kerouac?

Is?
8:21 PM
Chuck: Jack “I was a sponge on my friends and wrote a best-selling novel about it and probably didn’t give them a penny out of it” Kerouac?

Lorrie: That’s the one.

Chuck: Never heard of him.

Lorrie: Oh, you should check him out. He’s not even overrated.
8:22 PM
Chuck: He wrote the novel that some nut carried while doing some nutty thing. Right?

Lorrie: Yeah.

Lee sings Simple Man by Lynyrd Skynyrd

Chuck: Simple Man? Lee, play that dead band’s song.

Lorrie: already, he’s good.

Lee’s gonna win American Idol.
8:23 PM
Chuck: Yeah, if you can get the girls in the front section to clap….you’re a rock star.

Besides, didn’t Lee win a couple of years ago?
8:24 PM
Lorrie: what happens if you can get them to wave their arms?

Chuck: Seasick?

Randy likes it.

Lorrie: No, Chuck goes postal

Chuck: Jeez, could Randy push it any harder?
8:25 PM
Lorrie: word.

they want Lee to win.

He’s got more commercial potential

Chuck: This is the same script as last year. Push one all year and then claim the “dark horse” comes from behind to win.

Lorrie: Yes. It’s called the AI recipe.
8:26 PM
Chuck: He’s saying the same thing Crystal said when she gave her reasons why she picked a song….and yet Lee is considered a genious.
8:27 PM
Lorrie: During the break, Ryan will pass out more glasses of the AI Kool-Aid
8:28 PM
Chuck: Readers… you may not know this, but “drinking the Kool-Aid” is based on a horrible tragedy….Jonestown. Youngsters, look it up. But get permission from your parents.

And…..

a little bit of trivia…they didn’t actually drink “Kool-Aid”

It was an off-brand.
8:29 PM
Lorrie: Thank you, Mr. Wikipedia. As helpful as always.

Chuck: Bing!

Lorrie: LOL
8:32 PM
Chuck: Casey is singing “Daughters”

Oh god.

Lorrie: He was in front of an AT&T store in a strip mall? Where’s the parade? The key to the city? Texas Casey James Day?
8:33 PM
Chuck: Kara told Casey his audience is “women and girls” and Ellen made a great face. “Not this woman.”

That’s tomorrow

He took a decent song and made it boring.
8:34 PM
Lorrie: This, audience, is what is referred to as the final nail in the coffin.

…the straw that broke the camel’s back…

…he just screwed the pooch..

Chuck: the song that Casey sang?

Lorrie: his version of it.
8:35 PM
Chuck: I was riffing off your 1st two.

Going in the same vein…

God, Randy liked it.

He can’t complain about a song he picked.

Lorrie: Did you see that look on his face just now? That was his “yep, I’m screwed” look.
8:36 PM
Chuck: Simon is trying not to laugh in Kara’s face
8:38 PM
Why does Randy & Kara have to collaborate and Simon & Ellen get a pick each?

do
8:39 PM
Lorrie: I have no idea!
8:42 PM
Chuck: Maybe, I’m Amazed by McCartney & Wings
8:43 PM
picked by Ellen for Crystal

Already best of the night.

after one line
8:44 PM
Sounds better than Sir paul

or the guy who took his place in ’68
8:45 PM
Crystal gets a standing ovation.

Lorrie: That really was awesome

Chuck: and Randy gets to say “In it to win it.”
8:46 PM
Lorrie: Let’s call Simon Capt. Obvious for saying Crystal would be in the final.
8:48 PM
Chuck: I am getting a note that “Lorrie did not receive your chat”

I am not surprised.
8:49 PM
Lorrie: what happened?

Chuck: I think she is watching another channel and just tyoing random comments

oh

there she is

Lorrie: Dude, I’ve been here.

Chuck: Lorrie, I think you missed Siobhan singing “Jackie wilson Said”
8:50 PM
Lorrie: Is that Woodrow’s Wife?
8:51 PM
Chuck: Van Morrison song. Kind of like Lynyrd Skynyrd, but with talent, lyrical skill, and the ability to properly pronounce words.

Lorrie: and avoid planes that crash

Chuck: Lee sings “Hallalujah” “Hellelujah” “Hallelujah”
8:52 PM
ok

Lorrie….

a little help here….

it’s got to be easier than dentist

Lorrie: but not orthodontist

lol

Chuck: There is a secret chord Lee…and you just missed it.

8:53 PM
seriously? They added a gospel chorus as background for Lee?

Lorrie: They got him a pack of backup singers. That means they want him to win

Chuck: And the director pulled out all the stops
8:54 PM
Lorrie: Lee just looked like he was oxygen deprived toward the end.

Chuck: Jason castro sang the song better

Lorrie: ewww…you just typed Jason Castro.
8:55 PM
Chuck: Jason Castro sang it better

better

Castro

much better

Jason castro

there

Lorrie: ick! Stop it.
8:56 PM
Chuck: I swear you could a make a drinking game out of Kara saying “You are what this show is all about.”

Lorrie: There’s Kara’s dark horse reference…he was in one place at the beginning of the season and another at the end…yadda yadda
8:57 PM
call me weird…but sometimes Lee reminds me of Bobcat Goldwaite (sp?) sans the screeching, the way he struggles for words.

words seem painful to Lee.
8:58 PM
Chuck: Youngsters…you can find info on Bobcat Goldwithe on Bing…do not confuse him with the Charlotte Bobcats.
8:59 PM
Lorrie: bobcat goldthwait. Bing it!

Chuck: Ryan is being told to stretch it

Lorrie: Ladies and Gentleman, this final portion of the MI$ AI blog was presented tonight by Bing!
9:00 PM
MI4, that is.

OK, I’m outtie. See you tomorrow.

Chuck: Later

photo credit: gato-gato-gato

Lorrie: 37 million votes came in last night, and not one of them was from me. I haven’t voted all season.
9:03 PM
‘Tasia is performing tonight.
9:04 PM
Chuck: You can’t call it singing.

Lorrie: Yeah…notice I didn’t make that mistake. Did you know that Fantasia received orthodontic treatment after American Idol?

Chuck: Seriously?
9:05 PM
I want 10% of whatever you’re being paid.

Lorrie: I hate talking during a song.
9:06 PM
Chuck: She thinks she’s Diana Ross.

Lorrie: Unless it’s CDB singing/speaking Devil Went Down To Georgia.

Chuck: CDB didn’t have a decent song after Uneasy Rider.
9:07 PM
They peaked with the 1st hit.

Lorrie: Yes they did. Hush it!

Yes they did have a decent song after that, that is.

Chuck: “I’m a soul singer.”
9:08 PM
Lorrie: You don’t look like a soul singer.

Chuck: Yeah, brown-eyed soul.

Wait

That doesn’t sound right.
9:09 PM
Let me search the phrase.

P. Diddy and Russel Brand

Oh, that’ll be a hit.
9:10 PM
Lorrie: OK, get back to me when you figure out what you want to say.

Chuck: Well, my eyes aren’t blue enough for blue-eyed soul. Otherwise, you’d call me Daryl Welch…or Chuck Oates or something
9:11 PM
Come to think of it…John Oates doesn’t have blue eyes…does he?

Lorrie: Nope.

Chuck: Crystal Gayle had her brown eyes blue. I think.

Lorrie: Yep.
9:12 PM
Did you see Big Mike trying to cram his big behind in that tiny Ford in the commercial?

Aggghhh! WHy am I commenting on these ridiculous commercials!?!

Chuck: Not one single clue.
9:14 PM
Lorrie: They show a lot of Top 3 contestants returning home, but not from season 1. I wonder why?

Chuck: They didn’t have the budget to send them home.

So they let them make a long distance phone call.

Less than 10 mins though.

Lorrie: lol…they sent them home. Nikki McKibben even returned to her favorite karaoke bar, as I recall.
9:15 PM
Chuck: That was CGI.

It was a studio in Hollywood.
9:16 PM
They’re all four getting to go?

I’m guessing.

Lorrie: Yeah, but one goes home and stays home.
9:17 PM
Chuck: Mike is going home

is my last second guess
9:18 PM
Lorrie: I’m so torn between Mike and Casey. Somehow, I worry that Mike has a powerful voting contingent.
9:19 PM
Chuck: Casy is in the top 3

Casey

Lorrie: I’m with you now- Mike is going home.

Chuck: They need to tell Crystal is next
9:20 PM
Daughtery…oh joy. I wish I could fast-forward.

Lorrie: I like Daughtrey.

Chuck: That guy that finished 7th or 8th?
9:21 PM
Lorrie: I think it was 8th. Clearly, that didn’t matter in the long run. I remember him for his quote after getting voted off Idol: “My life definitely doesn’t suck.” THat was said in response every time he was asked if he felt like he got a raw deal for getting voted off what many felt was too soon.
9:22 PM
Chuck: I remember thinking he tanked a song just to get voted off.
9:23 PM
Lorrie: He’s another one where not winning did him more good than winning AI.
9:24 PM
Chuck: Wait, is that Chris Gaines?
9:25 PM

http://rigsamarole.files.wordpress.com/2009/09/824920082_945df7fc8d.jpg

Playing guitar for “Daughtry”
9:26 PM
How many bands use the last name of a band member?

I can name two others w/o thinking hard.
9:27 PM
Gentle readers…I think Lorrie left to floss.

Seriously, my daughter has the same haircut as the Daughtry guitarist.
9:28 PM
Not the one with the Mohawk.

Lorrie: Sorry…stepped away for a moment.

Fleetwood Mac
9:29 PM
Alman Brothers

Crosby, Stills, Nash & Young

Chuck: Shaved bald guys with beards look like this: http://monkeyblogmonkeydo.files.wordpress.com/2010/03/wooly-willy.jpg
9:30 PM
Lorrie: and, let us not forget The Who.

Fronted by Pete and Roger Who.

Chuck: I’ll take Fleetwood Mac, but you left out Van Halen

but your joke saved you
9:31 PM
though you left out the Ramones
9:32 PM
Lorrie: Ah yes, the Ramones. I wonder why they chose that name?

lol

Chuck: They had their name changed at Elis island.
9:33 PM
PS: J. Geils Band

Lorrie: Prior to Ellis Island, their last name was Hambone.
9:34 PM
Chuck: You’re confusing them with Leon redbone.

Lorrie: Oh. My bad.
9:35 PM
Chuck: No, Color Me Badd

Lorrie: No, In Living Color.
9:36 PM
This is Lee: I mean, I mean, I, I, I, I mean,
9:37 PM
Chuck: No, Ocean Color Scene

Lee is safe
9:38 PM
Are they trying to scare Crystal fans to vote for her?

Lorrie: No, Billy Ocean.

Chuck: No, Billy Bragg

Lorrie: No, Billy Idol.

Screw blogging about AI, this is more fun.

Chuck: No, American Idol

Wait…you messed me up

Lorrie: LOL
9:39 PM
Chuck: No, Billie Holiday
9:40 PM
Lorrie: No, Billy Squier
9:41 PM
Chuck: No, Billy Ray Cyrus

Lorrie: No, Miley Cyrus.

Have we won our Bing audition yet?

Chuck: No, but upon seeing Cyrus…my PC tried to shut down out of shame.
9:42 PM
Lorrie: Well you started it.
9:43 PM
Chuck: How did we forget

Bon Jovi?

Lorrie: It’s always the obvious ones…

His name is actually Bon Giovi, or something like that.
9:44 PM
Chuck: wait, I know. I went through that procedure from Enternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind

to forget

someone

Who is this singing?
9:45 PM
Lorrie: Grandpa Jones

Chuck: If anyone is reading this….leave a comment. I’ll allow you to leave an anonymous comment. I’d be embaressed too.

No, Buck Owens

Lorrie: No, Roy Clark.
9:46 PM
Chuck: I’m a Pickin’

Lorrie: And I’m a Grinnin’!

Chuck: So, Grandpa, what’s for dinner?

Lorrie: Butter beans and corn bread!
9:47 PM
Chuck: And that was bad?

Lorrie: Bon Jovi? Yes, that was bad.

Chuck: And we’re back!

Love how the one guitarist is told not to act like he’s really in the band.
9:48 PM
I promise you this…if Crystal goes home….you’re on your own for the rest of the season.

Lorrie: He succeeded
9:49 PM
Well, if she goes home, the blog this season is over, as far as I’m concerned.
9:53 PM
Chuck: Please tell the audience to shut up.

Lorrie: Shut up, Audience!

Chuck: Well, Mike is finally gone.
9:54 PM
Lorrie: Yes!

Chuck: Judges wasted a save on him they could have used for Siobhan.

Lorrie: Mike’s wife reminds me of one of those little troll dolls
9:55 PM
You are absolutely correct
9:56 PM
OK, guess I’ll see you next week now that Crystal’s safe.

Chuck: yes. I think
9:57 PM
I get a “I need sleep” week.

Lorrie: No you don’t. Only girls get those.

Chuck: Kara stands up and dances like Paula did.

Lorrie: I’m telling you, she found Paula’s pill stash under that desk.
9:58 PM
wow…that run at the end of that song was ridiculous. As in bad, not good.

Chuck: I think the prop guy wasn’t told to stop spiking the drink at that position.

Lorrie: Perhaps

Chuck: Why do we hear the judges talking to Mike?

9:59 PM boring, director, boring

Lorrie: More importantly, why are we still watching and blogging?

Good night.

Chuck: night

photo credit: Tom Hagerty for Metro I4 News

8:00 PM
Chuck: OH, Joy The top four…yet we don’t see Lilly or siobhan
8:01 PM
I picked who I wanted….someone forgot to mention the rest of the US that they can’t see talent.
8:02 PM
Duets….oh joy again.

Lorrie: Back when we started blogging, I couldn’t have imagined a Top 4 without Siobhan.
8:03 PM
Chuck: I can think of lots of people better to help them than Jamie Foxx

Lorrie: Do you have your Jamie Foxx antidote handy tonight, Chuck?

Chuck: Man they lay it on thick when they talk about Foxx
8:04 PM
Lilly will do Singing in the Rain for her solo.

Lorrie: yeah. I still think he’s kind of a jackass for the mean things he said about Miley Cyrus.

Chuck: I didn’t hear that
8:05 PM
Lorrie: OMG…this whole contestant/artist T-shirt thing sounds like something a 5th grade teacher would do.

Chuck: Jamie Foxx likes to get in faces
8:06 PM
Lorrie: I don’t get it. Having someone all up in my grill and still being able to perform can’t possibly mean that I could sing in front of 10,000 people

Chuck: It doesn’t

Lorrie: Lee sings Kiss from a Rose by Seal

Chuck: but Foxx came up with the idea so he has to sell it

Chuck: Lee is married to heidi Klum? Heidi DeWyze?

8:07 PM
Lorrie: Yep, and when Seal finds out he is gonna be PISSED.

Chuck: I’ll compare you to kiss by a rose on a grave?

Is that the lyric he’s singing?

Lorrie: This did not sound or feel like a Top 4 performance to me.
8:08 PM
Chuck: omg: Randy is teasing us by “almost” saying “in it to win it”

Lorrie: Randy and I are on the same page with his comment about Lee not having done anything different to the song.

Chuck: Ellen is channelling Paula
8:09 PM
If AI is on next season…they should ban the audience

Lorrie: Kara is dressed like she’s ready for the board room on The Apprentice.

I think Lee would have done well to have picked a Goo Goo Dolls song for movie songs tonight.
8:10 PM
Chuck: From the remake of Wings of Desire?
8:11 PM
Lorrie: No, from Der Himmel über Berlin.

Chuck: lol

Lorrie: LOL…I just had to wiki that.

Chuck: But I got it w/o having to look it up

I’m all over Wim Wenders

well, his movies

Lorrie: well, that doesn’t surprise me.
8:12 PM
Chuck: I want to see the A Team movie.
8:13 PM
Lorrie: Me too.

Chuck: You can’t watch foreign art films all day. The angst and ennui will kill you.
8:14 PM
Lorrie: I’d sooner gouge my eyes out with a spoon than watch foreign art films all day.

8:16 PM
Chuck: This is the 1st we hear that Mike made a goal to make the AI top 3.

Lorrie: Who’s Mike?

Chuck: And that he made it 1 year ago

The one on the show who should have left 3 weeks ago
8:17 PM
as opposed to the one that should have left last week

or the one that should have left 5 weeks ago

Lorrie: he’s rockin’ the biker chain on his jeans tonight.

Chuck: You see biker chain….I see 80s gay leather club.
8:18 PM
Lorrie: lol

Chuck: Not that I ever went to an 80s gay leather club

Meanwhile, I missed what Mike sang

What song was that?

Lorrie: I bet Big Mike had to lay down on the bed and use a coat hanger to zip up his pants tonight. Those suckers are tight.
8:19 PM
Chuck: Randy said “I don’t know what is going on tonight.”

I know: Jamie Foxx

Lorrie: I think it was called “River of Jordan.”

Chuck: Oh, the song was from Big Willy…wait, Free Willey
8:20 PM
Lorrie: Yeah, Big WIlly is the guy who just sang.

Chuck: River of Jordan….seriously…what does that mean?

I’m imagining a whole river of kids named Jordon swimming by
8:21 PM
Lorrie: That’s what it’s about! How did you know that?

Chuck: I confess, Wikipedia

Lorrie: I should’ve known…
8:24 PM
Chuck: Again, I would like to mention that the cows trying to eliminate the chickens is a form of genocide.
8:25 PM
Lorrie: I think it’s a hate crime.
8:26 PM
Chuck: Well, to protest, I’ve restricted going to Chik-fil-a to Sundays only.

Next up is “Falling Slowly” by Lee & the only talent left in the competition

Lorrie: I think it’s silly to do duets with the contestants.
8:27 PM
Chuck: It would be silly to do duets with the contestants….there’s too many of us
8:28 PM
Lorrie: I thought this sounded like a bunch of yelling. Hated it.

Chuck: Last year, Kris Allen sang that song….much better

Lorrie: Randy has been drinking the Kool-Aid again. As has Ellen.
8:29 PM
What? Kara called this a favorite moment of the season?! Maybe it’s ME who’s smoking crack tonight.

Chuck: No, you forget how bad the season has been
8:30 PM
Crystal is holding Lee’s guitar…fingering his fret.

That is not inneuendo by the way

Lorrie: yeah…odd-looking.

Chuck: Casey is singing the theme from the Graduate? Mrs. Robinson?

goo-goo-ja-oob

coo-coo-ja-oob

whatever

Lorrie: I love that song.
8:31 PM
Chuck: Casey doesn’t have a clue who was Joe Dimaggio and why america needed him
8:32 PM
Lorrie: is that Wyclef Jean in a Ritz crackers commercial??
8:33 PM
Chuck: Well, Bob Marley is dead..and that wasn’t a Red Stripe commercial…so I say yes
8:34 PM
Lorrie: Jamie Foxx really tries to make contestant feel uncomfortable during rehearsal.

Chuck: Jamie Foxx has sexual issues….he likes getting in the face of guys and saying “seduce me”
8:35 PM
Don’t clap you idiots…worse than hand waving

Lorrie: lol

Chuck: I hate to say…. I like what he is doing with the song

at least he is trying. Yes, folks, he’s in it to win it!

Lorrie: I like it, too.

8:36 PM
Lorrie: PUt on that artist T-shirt, Dawg!

Best of the night, thus far.

Chuck: Not saying much

Lorrie: no, but still.

Chuck: and the end…he mispronounced “pray”
8:38 PM
Randy…Casey didn’t see the movie…he has no idea that you’re doing a Mrs. Robinson joke.

Lorrie: he reminded me of Jason Castro’s Somehwere Over the Rainbow with that little guitar. Even though I couldn’t stand Castro.

Chuck: Randy said casey didn’t do anything with the song…and Ellen says he did and Randy agrees with her.
8:39 PM
Lorrie: Go figure.
8:40 PM
Chuck: Next duet is Mike & Casey?

Lorrie: oooooh. Crystal is gonna sing I’m Alright I bet. Already, I think I’ll love it.

Chuck: Crystal is doing I’m alright?

Lorrie: THat’s my guess.
8:43 PM
Chuck: I can’t believe no one picked “Crazy for You”

Lorrie: Andrew would’ve picked that one.

You’re talking about the Madonna song, right?

Chuck: Yes from Vision Quest…the wrestling movie

Lorrie: I called it.

8:45 PM
I like Kenny Loggins

starting out acoustic. Nice touch.
8:46 PM
Chuck: Bottom two: Mike & Lee

Lorrie: This is a great song for her, lyrics-wise, style-wise, everything.

SHe’s the best of the night now.
8:47 PM
Chuck: easily

but we suspected that an hour ago.

Lorrie: true.

Chuck: She had her competition eliminated

There

I said it…out in the open

Crystal had Lilly & Siobhan eliminated

8:49 PM
Lorrie: Way to call out Tony, Crystal’s boyfriend on his dancing, Ryan. You ass.

Chuck: Everything I do I do it for you? by Mike & Casey
8:52 PM
Lorrie: I hope not.
8:53 PM
Chuck: Have you ever really loved a woman

I’m guessing not.

Casey
8:54 PM
Casey is outplaying Mike on that big boy guitar

Lorrie: amen.
8:55 PM
Chuck: Seriously, to sit in the front of the audience are you required to have no control of your arms as they flow like fish out of water?

flop…not flow

Lorrie: I missed parts of this performance because Three Dog Night was performing under my feet. Literally, 3 dogs were scrappin’ and chasing each other my feet.

Ellen got her gay line in there.

Chuck: Ellen did the expected joke.
8:57 PM
Lorrie: OK. Enough of this crap. I bet Glee will be better than AI was tonight.

Chuck: not taking that bet

Lorrie: My bottom two- Lee and Mike.

Chuck: hmmmm….sounds familiar. We agree yet again.

photo credit: Tom Hagerty for Metro I4 News

Lorrie: I guess so, but I’m off my schedule and can’t seem to get it straightened out.

Chuck: I’ll help — They all sucked, but Lilly & Siobhan killed.

9:00 PM Lorrie: LOL. Sorry I missed those two chicks. I hear Lady Gaga is on tonight.

Chuck: No, Connick is singing “Radio Ga Ga”

Lorrie: Oh, my bad.

Chuck: No, if you sang Radio Ga Ga it would be your bad.

Lorrie: I liked your post from last night, BTW.

Chuck: Thank you. I am not sure if I wrote it. I fell asleep when Ryan came on and when I woke up it was on the screen

Lorrie: Hey…does our public know that we’ll be signing autographs at the Blue Sky West open house tomorrow night?

Chuck: They do now. What a surprise. They’re now singing a medley of Sinatra standards

Lorrie: I don’t think Sinatra was a good theme choice.

Chuck: lol Aaron sings “When I was 17″

Lorrie: Oh my, I think they may have been going for the Shania-dressed-in-men’s-clothes look, but they wound up making her look like one of the Indigo Girls, in my opinion.

Chuck: They are lip syncing

Lorrie: I’m talking about Crystal, my the way.

Chuck: If she looked like the Indigo Girls she’d be closer to fine

Lorrie: Ba-dum-dum! Have I mentioned that Big Mike does nothing for me? WHy is he still here?

Chuck: The big question is why are we here?

Lorrie: word.

Chuck: Word Up. by Cameo

I feel like a Bing commercial.

Lorrie: LOL. And you act like one, too.

Chuck: Act One. Guards patrol the castle in Denmark

And we cut to commercial…

Chuck: Songs of the Cinema with Jamie Foxx is next week. BTW Next week I’ll have emergency surgery

Lorrie: to cure what ailment?

Chuck: CantStandFoxxitis

Lorrie: lol…I love how you can predict the need for “emergency” surgery.

Chuck: I keep in close contact with my illnesses. With my schedule, we have to plan such things to fit them all in.

Lorrie: This is riveting television, learning what the contestants’ Tuesdays used to be like.

Mike left out the part where he would eat a small child for breakfast.

That is one big-ass tattoo on Crystal’s back. SHe ought to regret that one when she’s older.

Chuck: Wasn’t last night the first time we’ve seen it?

Lorrie: It’s certainly the first time I’ve seen it. It’s as big as a stop sign, so surely she hasn’t shown it before.

Chuck: Mike is safe.

Lorrie: Crystal said she feels like one of the guys. Tonight she looks like one of the guys.

Casey’s going home tonight. I’ve seen his last night’s performance.

Chuck: Lee is safe.

Lorrie: Lee looks like he tied one on last night and he looks uncomfortable as hell.

Chuck: Lee realized long ago, he is just a pale imitation of David Cook.

Lorrie: only with all of his hair. Cook has a comb-over. Or, should I say, comb-forward.

Chuck: Did someone slip Valium in all their Cokes? Lee is safe? I am so shocked.

Lorrie: Yes. It’s necessary to keep from going into epileptic fits when watching a Lady Gaga performance.

Chuck: In that case….you’re on your own while she is on.

Lorrie: You’re gonna miss some real craziness…

Chuck: If I need to see real craziness, I just look into a mirror. You can’t fool me. Lady Gaga is just Tori Amos in drag.

Lorrie: LOL…she’s better than Tori Amos. wonder who comes up with Lady GG’s crazy-ass costumes.

Chuck: Those aren’t costumes. I bought that outfit at Target yesterday.

Lorrie: Are you wearing that to the Blue Sky West thingy tomorrow night? If so, I will just die because I had planned to wear MY outfit like that. I think she’s wearing all the netting over her face to mask the fact that she’s lip syncing.

Chuck: As for what the male dancers are wearing, look up an old picture of Jack Lalayne

Lorrie: True!

This song sucks. Somebody should put Alejandro out of his misery.

Chuck: Isn’t that what she’s doing?

Lorrie: I don’t know what all of her dance moves are called, but at least one I’ve seen should be called “The Whack-Off.” My apologies for being crude.

Well, not really.

Chuck: Seriously, a flaming statute with stigmata? How old-fashioned.

Our garage band did that in 1982.

Lorrie: LOL

Chuck: You might have heard of us: U1

Lorrie: Haven’t heard of them. I did however, have the bootleg cassette of UB30′s garage recording.

Chuck: I was once in UB30′s garage. It was next to a ska park.

Lorrie: Down the street from the red, red wine store?

Chuck: Yes, that’s it. They lived it up then. Before their hit, “I Gout You, Babe.”

Lorrie: Harry Connick Jr. is funny as hell.

Chuck: Crystal just checked her insulin PUMP!!! Now we know.

Lorrie: That’s code for P-R-E-G-N-A-N-T.

Chuck: I am keeping this episode just to watch Connick mess with them again. Lee thought Harry was Chris Isaak? You mean Harry Connick isn’t Chris Isaak’s new stage name?

Harry Connick then starts to sing a Beatles hit….something, something….wait, no “And I love her.”

Tell this contestent that Beatles week was 4 weeks ago.

He looks under his eyebrows likes he’s a straight guy singing “And I love her” in a gay bar.

Lorrie: I’m getting very sleepy. And I love me some HCJ. But this is a snooze. AAAAGH!!! Stop waiving your arms!

Chuck: See? See what I mean?

Lorrie: THere, I took care of that for you, Chuck.

Chuck: Thanks.

Lorrie: Double AAAAGH!!!

Chuck: By the way….in case you missed it: As Connick sings, he looks under his eyebrows likes he’s a straight guy singing “And I love her” in a gay bar.

Lorrie: LOL….were you expecting me to have a certain reaction from that comment?

Chuck: No, I just smirked with satisfaction as I typed it. And I wanted to feel that smirk again.

Lorrie: Do you feel better now? Good.

Chuck: It takes a certain masochist to want to hear your own songs ruined as you are on stage with the offenders.

(The Top 5 are “singing” Connick’s songs as he plays piano.”)

Lorrie: I hope you’re clarifying this for the readers and not me.

Chuck: We have readers? You really do need more sleep.

Lorrie: Casey is a good-looking you ng man with pretty teeth (must have had a great orthodontist) but I think his number is up tonight.

Chuck: Harry Connick just said he was singing at Frank Sinatra’s 75th birthday party…”And the world’s greatest singers were there.”

Lorrie: What the hell was up with Ryan just saying the HCJ is “still with his wife Jill..”??? As though Ol’ Blue Eyes would have stolen her away that night in the elevator?

Chuck: For our “readers”: Connick told a story how he forgot the words singing in front of Sinatra and Sinatra was a really smarmy geezer.

Well, Ryan was projecting. A big ol smackeroo from Ol’ Blue Eyes and he would have run away with him.

Of course, by “Ol Blue Eyes” I mean Ryan imagines himself.

bad dum!

Lorrie: No he doesn’t silly. He likes boys. Not Jill.

Chuck: no no

(By the way, when you explain a joke you know it was bad…but here we go)

I meant Ryan imagines running away with himself.

Lorrie: oh. Let’s move on. We’re losing our reader.

Chuck: She just fell asleep.

Lorrie: Crystal is wearing a flower vase in her ear tonight.

Chuck: If Aaron is with Crystal…they are both safe.

oh oh

If Crystal is with Casey…he is out and the audience is being told to vote more for Crystal.

Lorrie: Agreed.

Wooohooo!!!

Chuck: Mike and aaron means aaron is out

Lorrie: Yeah, I think you’re right. But I’ll be pleased with whomever goes home out of those two.

Chuck: no, the problem is AAron will go home and Mike’s fans will vote harder for him next week.

Lorrie: Aaron is outta there.

Chuck: Mike just told Aaron if he had been told he was out he may have punted the kid off the stage.

Lorrie: OK…I can skip the montage…I’m out. See ya next week!

Chuck: Do I have to?

Lorrie: yes, you have to.

Chuck: Oh ok.

Lorrie: Bye!

Chuck: I’ll reschedule the emergency surgery

photo credit: mattmc89

I once promised to stop watching if she or Crystal left the show, but with Lorrie out…I am forced to soldier on.

I’m looking to make a “Fly Me to the Moon” joke tonight.

A little Sinatra trivia by writer Jonathan Gould in the Beatles bio Can’t Buy Me Love, Sinatra used the term “My Bird” as a catchphrase. As in “How’s your bird?”

or “I got a little water in my bird.” Sinatra also had a distaste for the Beatles back in 1965 and said so in a press release. John Lennon evidently read that and

wrote: “And Your Bird Can Sing” Check out the lyrics….

You tell me that you’ve got everything you want
And your bird can sing
But you don’t get me, you don’t get me

You say you’ve seen seven wonders and your bird is green
But you can’t see me, you can’t see me

When your prized possessions start to weigh you down
Look in my direction, I’ll be round, I’ll be round

When your bird is broken will it bring you down
You may be awoken, I’ll be round, I’ll be round

You tell me that you’ve heard every sound there is
And your bird can swing
But you can’t hear me, you can’t hear me.

oh, evidently the show has started….

Lee, Casey, Aaron, Mike, and Crystal

Harry Connick said “This is American Idol”

I’m for anything that saves me from hearing Ryan say it again.

Who has the ego to sing My Way? I’m thinking Michael. Of course, I preferred the Sid Vicious version.
If Lorrie was here, she’d mention Crystal is dressed up tonight.

I liked Sinatra’s music…can’t say I cared for his public ego.

Connick wrote the score for the contestants? “You think Shania Twain was up in here doing this? ” Connick said. No, she wasn’t. And I bet she made as much

for the show as you did.

He’s also playing piano for each contestant? AI got him cheap.

Ryan spent 2 minutes boring us asking Connick questions. Seven mins in and I wish they’d fly me to the moon.

(Already)

Sinatra’s daughters bring Simon one of Frank’s hankies. Those boots are made for shufflin now-a-days.

Connick is actually helping Aaron with good advice.

Connick should take Simon’s place.

Sorry, Aaron, this Fly Me to the Moon sounds like it’s being sung by a 16yo

A smidge better in the second verse…well, until I wrote that. Getting worse.

The kid smiles through it all though.,

I am so sick of Randy saying “In it to win it.” And Randy liked him. I am not in touch with these judges. Simon mentions Aaron’s lack of conviction. That

sounds right.

Casey is going to sing Blue Skies.

Now that I think of it, Lilly should sing “My Way”

Casey tells a sad story on how he counts people as friends who have no idea who he is or what he does.

Seriously, seeing Aaron & Casey have convinced me that Sinatra needed that ego to sell these songs. I am hating what Casey is doing to Blue Skies.

Well, respect to Casey. One of his friends is an “alternate dresser.” Takes conviction to ask your friend to come on national tv (no pun…well, yes a pun) and

support you.

Well, the judges disliked Casey
also. Simon does a fair joke at Casey’s expense.

I liked hearing Connick say Casey sang it better in rehersal.

Crystal is singing “Summer Wind”

Connick says “There’s nothing I need to tell you.” Does he recognize talent?

She has a huge tat on her back. (The best I can do to give you Lorrie’s clothing report.)

I doubt the judges will like it. It was very laidback. Siobhan would have made something wild out of the song.

Kara likes Crystal’s “phrasing.” Simon throws out the “being in it to win it.”

Crystal explained why she sang it that way. “I don’t think I should sing big notes just because I’m on American Idol”

Well, depends on if you want to win American Idol.

Mike is singing the Way You Look Tonight.

He actually has the swagger needed to carry off the song. But I couldn’t handle the album “Big Mike Sings Ol’ Blue Eyes”

Well, Randy has decided to champion Mike.

I believe AI often gives us the least offensive singer…and we seem to be heading that way this season.

Simon also liked Mike.

The judges mention liking the arrangement…but Connick gets all that credit.

Lee is singing That’s Life

Connick is funny in the interview. Lee’s not so bad, but the band seems louder this time.

And Lee doesn’t have the voice to overcome that. He also seems out of breath at the end.

The judges like Lee. Kara thinks he needs more confidence.

I think the bottom two will be Aaron & Casey.

Going home is Casey.

photo credit: STC4blues

A band opens the show….
9:03 PM
So this is Flatt & Scruggs? Will they play the Beverly Hillbillies Theme?
9:04 PM
Kara always acts like such a fan. She’s pimping for her songs.

Lorrie: Flatt & Scruggs would be something to see. These guys? eh. Just alright for me, Dawg.
9:05 PM
Chuck: When you see a band of three guys with a backup band of 6…you know they do a lot of dubbing to create their records.
9:06 PM
The guy on Ryan’s right looks 15 years younger than the other 2

Lorrie: Rascal Flatts & Shakira= weirdest combo in the world.
9:07 PM
Chuck: No, the weirdest combo is Shakira and Music
9:09 PM
I just saw a commercial that advertised Avatar as “The Greatest Movie of All Time”
9:10 PM
(There..having “Avatar” will get us a few confused hits)

Lorrie: lol

Chuck: Siobhan is the only one who looks like a vampire.
9:11 PM
Lorrie: this vampire commercial looks cheesy. But Siobhan looks like she should be in the next Twilight movie.

LOL

You beat me again.
9:12 PM
Chuck: You said it better.

Fast & good!

We’re a team.
9:13 PM
Is it Shrek: Forever After or Shrek:The Final Chapter

Lorrie: I like the Shrek movies.
9:14 PM
Chuck: That was bad casting.

(The singers doing a scene from the film.)

Lorrie: This is going to be another long night that could have been wrapped up in 5 minutes. Just give us the Bottom 3.

But that’s not going to happen so…
9:15 PM
Chuck: These people are easily amused.

Lorrie: I think we should take this opportunity to tell our three readers about the Blue Sky West Ribbon cutting

May 6

Chuck: Where they could meet the staff of Lakeland Local…at least those who plan to show up.
9:16 PM
and metro I4 News

Lorrie: Hey, that will be a HUGE draw.

lol
9:17 PM
Chuck: Ryan should not direct real actors.

or Cameron Diaz

Lorrie: LOL
9:19 PM
They say Aaron likes Rascal Flatts, but I think he’d like to be the second lady in Lady Antebellum
9:20 PM
Did the Bucs draft that big black guy who’s standing in the 3rd group?

Chuck: We don’t care Ryan

Groups: (1) Siobhan & Lee (2) Aaron & Casey (3) Mike & Crystal

Group 2 is in trouble.
9:21 PM
People laughed when Kara said she was a big fan of Casey “& not just because you’re good looking

Lorrie: Crystal’s head is pregnant

Chuck: Groups: (1) Siobhan & Lee (2) Aaron & Crystal (3) Mike & Casey
Group 3 is in trouble.
9:22 PM
Lorrie: I think Group 2 is the bottom group.

Chuck: You know…they never promise that the person next to the bottom person is actually the person with the least votes
9:23 PM
Lorrie: Holy schnikeys!!

Chuck: Mike, Casey & Siobhan in bottom 3

Lorrie: I think Casey’s going home.

Chuck: Yeah

Who did you have in bottom 3?
9:24 PM
Lorrie: It was my dream bottom three- I know I had Aaron and Mike in it. I can’t remember the third one now.

Chuck: Cause my 3 was “Casey, Siobhan, & Mike”

Lorrie: I knew it wasn’t likely to be right, though.

Chuck: and the bottom three is…….
9:25 PM
yes, you read it here 24 hours ago…. Casey, Mike & Siobhan
9:26 PM
Lorrie: Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you….the Great Carsoni!

He placed those three names in a hermetically sealed container last night.

Chuck: I found the answer in an envelope in a mayonaise jar of the Funk & Wagnells porch

lol — we are old old people.
9:27 PM
Lorrie: You are…I just snuck into the living room to watch TV when I was but a child and my parents were asleep.

Chuck: harry connick jr & sinatra songs?
9:28 PM
Lilly will sing “My Way”

Lorrie: ooooh, Harry Connick Jr. is next week’s mentor- Sinatra songs. Could be interesting.

dang it! Beat me again.

Who’s Sons of Sylvia? Never heard of ‘em

Chuck: These guys are brothers with a mother named Sylvia?
9:29 PM
Lorrie: I can’t understand a damn thing that guy is singing.

Chuck: Maybe they’re fans of Dr. Hook & the Medicine Show “Sylvia’s Mother”

Lorrie: They look like extras in Twilight. The vampire theme is rampant tonight.
9:30 PM
that’s weird to be playing violin and singing simultaneously.
9:31 PM
Chuck: We have a guy who plays a Green Day guitar like it is a pedal steel guitar, another who uses a violin like he’s Charlie Daniels at age 12, and the third is actually, I kid you not, playing an electric mandolin
9:32 PM
Lorrie: Color me underwhelmed.

Are they considered country?

Chuck: Somebody’s country

Just not mine.
9:33 PM
Lorrie: Transylvania.
9:36 PM
Chuck: Oh, so Lady Antebellum is a band

Lorrie: agggghhhh! I HATE HATE this song.
9:37 PM
Chuck: Oh, just remember the song “Nobody” by Sylvia…that forces all other songs out of your head

Lorrie: Well your nobody called today…

she hung up when I asked her name…
9:38 PM
Chuck: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-AfvRWvvP1U

There you go

that’ll help

Lorrie: Well I wonder, does she think she’s being clever?

I don’t need the help, but thanks. I can sing that song from beginning to end.

That song is a curse, I tell you.
9:39 PM
Chuck: I’ll stand in line behind nobody, nobody.

See…I didn’t even hear that Lady Antebellium song
9:40 PM
Mike looks like he knows it is him

Lorrie: Sylvia did manage to drown it out a bit for me. God rest her soul.

I know she’s probably not dead, but she should be for recording that song.
9:42 PM
Chuck: “Since 2002, Sylvia has been a life coach where she helps individuals working in the music industry – singers, songwriters, musicians, recording artists, and music industry professionals. She also coaches people who work at non-profit agencies.”

Lorrie: somebody’s been on Wikipedia.

Chuck: That means Sylvia and I are doing similar work.
9:43 PM
Lorrie: lol…only you don’t have people singing an irritating song back to you when you enter the room of a client.
9:44 PM
Chuck: Well, actually they do.

I just can’t tell you what song.
9:45 PM
That’s Bob Dylan!

Wait, no, it’s Shakira.

Lorrie: Shakira plays harmonica?

Her voice is so weird to me.
9:46 PM
Chuck: Well, it’s like she worked to get rid of her Columbian accent.

Lorrie: This could very well be the weirdest duet I’ve ever witnessed.
9:47 PM
Chuck: What’s weird is that he sings the high parts.

Lorrie: He looks scared to death to try dancing beside her.

Wow, that final harmoinca was some good stuff. LMAO.

Chuck: She was better on her show for kids.
9:48 PM
He is asking Shkira for advice for six people she never watched.

Her advice “Keep your eyes on the stars & your feet on the ground”
9:49 PM
She credits Eleanor Roosevelt

Seacrest says casey Kaseem

Mike is safe.

Casey is SCARED!

Lorrie: He should be scared.

Chuck: But Siobhan should be scared.
9:50 PM
Lorrie: I still think that when the time comes for Siobhan to go home, it will be better for her than if she were to win AI. She’s such an individual, and we all know of the lame-ass songs given to the Idol winner as their first recordings…
9:51 PM
Chuck: Exactly

The best finish for Idol is 4th.

Lorrie: why do you say 4th?
9:53 PM
Chuck: 1=lame songs / 2nd-lame contract / 3rd-Considered “Loser”

4th is always “Was kicked off too early!”

Lorrie: Agreed…unless you’re Chris Daughtrey…then 8th is your magic number.
9:54 PM
Chuck: He was 4th

Told you

Siobhan is gone

Lorrie: OMG.

Chuck: She & Crystal split an audience
9:55 PM
She is trying hard not to give America the finger

Lorrie: LOL. I’ll do it for her.

Chuck: So, do you have someone in mind for my replacement?
9:56 PM
Lorrie: It is mind-blowing to me that she’s going home. But, like I said, she’s gonna be just fine.
9:57 PM
Chuck: Three of those guys should be embaressed they’re still in the competition and she is going home.

Lorrie: ABSOLUTELY. It really irritates the Hell out of me that she’s going home before Big Mike.
9:58 PM
I hope the judges say something really nice to her.
9:59 PM
Chuck: Siobhan is hell with you….I’m hugging my mom

Ellen is telling Siobhon that she is going to be on her show

Does Ellen always have the loser on her show?
10:00 PM
Lorrie: Yeah, I think so.

OK,it’s been fun. Post away!
10:01 PM
Chuck: okey

Lorrie: Good night!

Chuck: night…

photo credit: Archie McPhee Seattle

AI starts and they lead with a description of the six finalists: The Paint Salesman, The High School Kid, The Dad, The….

Chuck: It’s the Villiage People!

Lorrie: I’m live blogging from a satellite location this evening, because my laptop is on loan elsewhere.

AI live blogging is THAT important to me.

Chuck: I hope you’re in the same time zone

Lorrie: thankfully, yes.
8:03 PM
Chuck: oh god help me

Where is Andrew to sing Man, I Feel Like a Woman”

Lorrie: LOL. He’s probably asking himself the same question right about now.
8:04 PM
I feel kinda bad for the guys this week. Most of her songs are downright girlie.

Chuck: I may know two.
8:05 PM
Lorrie: I want one of the the guys to sing “Honey, I’m Home.”
8:06 PM
Ahaaaa, Shania has the same thought as me about the guys and her songs.

Chuck: Where’s Mutt Lange?
8:07 PM
Not so bad

Lorrie: In the dog house still…where all mutts belong

Chuck: What is this? “Still the One” Lee

Lorrie: I genuinely enjoy listening to Lee.

Chuck: Very AI song..start slow…kick it up…end slow
8:08 PM
Lorrie: I didn’t love the way he ended it, though.

Look at Kara, lookin’ all starry-eyed at Lee as Randy talks.
8:09 PM
Chuck: Kara looks like she has some sort of Stark/Iron Man power supply on her chest
8:10 PM
Lorrie: Awww, Simon is pouting already, just 10 min. into the show.

Chuck: Simon was right…Lee kept licking the corner of his mouth

Lorrie: I missed that, somehow.
8:15 PM
Chuck: Mike – It Only Hurts When I’m Breathing

Lorrie: Who’s Mike?
8:16 PM
Chuck: Mike, her ex-husband…right?

Lorrie: No, that’s Mutt.

Chuck: Mutt, Mike, Maramaduke, Whatever
8:17 PM
Waving the damn arms.

Lorrie: I have to say, Whatshisface has improved, in my opinion. This is the closest I’ve come to liking him is this week.

Chuck: Poorly waving the damn arms
8:18 PM
Was there a song?

I missed it.
8:19 PM
Lorrie: Randy says there’s a big, wide-open space for Mike Lynche. I certainly hope so….he’s as wide as a barn.
8:20 PM
Chuck: So, Sibhon sings “That Don’t Impress Me Much” ?
8:21 PM
Shania hasn’t had a single in 5 years

What does she know of modern music?

Lorrie: Only because she hasn’t needed to. Home girl is Looo-ho-ho-ded. Loaded!
8:22 PM
Chuck: Well, Mutt will get half and a piece of the production
8:24 PM
So, you know, in the Chik-Fil-A commercials, the cows are advocating chicken genocide.

Lorrie: I’m not going to engage in commercial chat tonight. You won’t lure me this time, Chuck.
8:26 PM
Chuck: Who is going to pay for the extra bandwidth I had to order for the millions reading our chat?

Lorrie: lol
8:27 PM
Chuck: Casey is singing “Don’t”

I say, “Don’t Sing, Casey!”

Lorrie: His hair fabulous tonight.
8:28 PM
This is a good song for him.
8:29 PM
Chuck: It wasn’t better than “Jealous Guy”

Lorrie: Casey is going to be the male version of Taylor Swift…right down to the hair.

I agree that Jealous guy was better
8:30 PM
But this was great

Chuck: Casey is going to date some werewolf?

Lorrie: yes. And remember, readers, you read it here first.
8:31 PM
Chuck: Why are hearing the guys then the girls?

Lorrie: Hey, was that Mutt Lange sitting beside Shania?

Chuck: I was waiting for that joke.

I figured I had already given two Mutt Lange jokes.

8:32 PM
Lorrie: That’s why we’re a team, I am ready, willing and able to pick up where you leave off.

Chuck: Speaking of Taylor Swift
8:33 PM
yes, readers, the old guy knows teen pop
8:35 PM
Hmmm, SYTYCD looks interesting

Yes, I through in two commercial comments

threw

geez

Lorrie: haha
8:36 PM
Shania has a great orthodontist, apparently

Chuck: Crystal – No One Needs to Know

Lorrie: This is a great song. Really cute and happy

Chuck: Yes, readers, it took Lorrie 36 mins to drop in her dentist reference
8:37 PM
well, Crystal has a country band

Lorrie: Nowhere near as good as the original.

Sadly

Chuck: She sounds more like Patsy Cline than Shania Twain
8:38 PM
Lorrie: This whole version is more bluegrass than the original. Guess that’s how she’s “changing it up” tonight.

Chuck: So was the redhead behind her Ricky Minor?
8:39 PM
Lorrie: OK, so it’s the cuspids that are missing on Crystal, not the bicuspids. And it almost looks like they’re not missing, but stuck behind her other teeth.
8:40 PM
Chuck: Only Crystal can talk back so well.

Lorrie: Agreed.
8:41 PM
The judges don’t love her this week, but she’s totally safe.
8:42 PM
Chuck: Aaron was flashing gang signs?
8:46 PM
Aaron is singing You’ve Got a Way
8:47 PM
no, evidently he thinks he is singing “You Got Away”

Lorrie: This kid has a good voice.

Chuck: But not good enunciation
8:48 PM
Lorrie: And not good facial expressions

He’s got a country music career ahead of him, in my opinion.
8:50 PM
…and the votes go up!!! Now that he said he sang it to his mom.

Simon’s critique of him was spot on tonight.
8:51 PM
I agree that it’s going to be tough to pick someone who goes home tonight. But I’m still willing to make a prediction.

Chuck: It’s very good he took out the “When We Make Love” line

Willing? It’s a requirement
8:52 PM
Lorrie: I think Siobhan will sing Any Man of Mine.

Didn’t Ryan say she was singing Shania’s first hit?
8:53 PM
Chuck: Thinks so “1st Country Hit”
8:54 PM
Whose Bed Have Your Boots Been Under

or Any Man of Mine
8:55 PM
Lorrie: ANy Man of Mine it is!
8:56 PM
Chuck: Oh, the judges won’t like this

Well, its getting more life

Lorrie: Her voice sounded kind of weird in the beginning.

Chuck: And dying again

The walking – singing is lame
8:57 PM
Lorrie: There’s her signature high note!

Chuck: oh bad note note

high

My bottom Two:

Lorrie: You know who she kind of sounds like when she sings? Meryl Streep in Postcards from the Edge.

Chuck: Casey & Sibohan
8:58 PM
Lorrie: I’m shocked at the judges’ comments.

Chuck: Obviously I am not matching the judges

Lorrie: I genuinely didn’t think she would be liked tonight.

Chuck: I like Simon’s “Giving Birth” comment
8:59 PM
There was Lee’s sideways singing
9:00 PM
Ok, to make a bottom 3…add Michael
9:01 PM
Lorrie: My Bottom 3- Mike Lynche, Aaron Kelly, and…hold onto your sox….Crystal Bowersox.

Chuck: Sibhon sang that last note diofferent in rehersal

Shania didn’t hug Sibhon

Lorrie: OK, on a personal note, I have to say that it’s not surprise that I’ve never been a fan of Mike or Aaron, although I thought they both performed well tonight.
9:03 PM
Happy chattin’ with ya tonight. See you tomorrow!

Chuck: later — Fun as always

photo credit: produzentin

front photo credit: PinkMoose

The period from May 3 to May 28 is the final opportunity for student applications to Polk County magnet and choice schools for the 2010-2011 school year. Applications can be submitted online only at www.polk-fl.net. Individuals without computer or Internet access can complete the application on school district computers at any magnet or choice school or by visiting the Office of Magnet and Choice Schools at the school district administrative office, 1915 South Floral Avenue, Bartow. Applications will be processed according to the date received. For more information: (863) 534-0631.

froint photo credit: Tom Hagerty for Metro I4 News

American Idol, not the chat.

The theme was “Inspirational Songs” and neither of our critics found inspiration in this week’s episode of “Can you believe Miley Cyrus Turned Out Better Singers than Alicia Keys?”

•

(Lorrie’s comment are plain text, and those from Chuck are in italics)

I’m minus my blogging buddy tonight. Chuck’s off being a good Samaritan, so I feel off my snarky game already.

Not true…I’m here…just time shifted. I am typing this an hour later. BTW, Samaritans got abad rap. I bet plenty were good.

With that said (ho hum), American Idol has Alicia Keys as the contestants’ mentor tonight. This week’s theme is songs of inspiration.

Inspiration? You mean “Money?” “My Ding-a-Ling?”

Ellen is dressed as though she just came from a gig where she impersonated John Lennon in a Beatles Abbey Road photo shoot.

Does Tim think changing his hair style will make people think he’s not Tim>?

Big Mike has to pick up Alicia when he hugs her. I’m getting tired of him picking up everyone he hugs. Just because you’re the size of a freightliner, Mike, doesn’t mean you have to pick up everyone and squeeze them like they’re a Care Bear.

Casey is up first tonight with Don’t Stop by Fleetwood Mac

Casey is giving the song a slightly different flavor, but it still is reminiscent of the original. Overall, a decent performance, but nothing that blows me away.

He sounds like he’s doing the 5th song in a bar band set to get the crowd up…in 1978.

Oh no…a flash shot of fans with cardboard guitar cut-outs.

I think the 3 guitars said “Casey” “James” “Sucks” — check the tape

Simon says he’s surprised by Casey’s song choice, that it isn’t “inspirational.”

Simon said it was a “lazy song choice.” SO true.

No one mentions it was Clinton’s road song

Chuck- when you watch this show played back, perhaps you can decipher what the heck was said about the guitar Casey was playing. It sounded like kind of a big deal.

Casey used a Lindsey Buckingham guitar. (Buckingham was in Fleetwood Mac at the time of that song.)

I should mention that I HATE watching this show by myself.

Lee Deweise– The Boxer
I definitely see Lee as the dark horse in this competition. I like this song, and I like his version.
Here, Chuck, let me say it for you: PUT YOUR HANDS DOWN, AUDIENCE!!!

Lee is too much like the guy who won two years ago. What was his name?

I love The Boxer. I see soldiers returning home whenever I hear it.

Can’t say I like hearing the lyric changes to reduce the song time and to make it wary too simple …lie ta la lie ta la la la la.

But it’s better than Art Garfunkel could sing it now.

PS: Paul Simon sang the lead on the original…and much better.

Simon called it “brilliant”…Simon is getting soft.

Jeez…..They set up Sully everywhere. The pilot..not the Monster.

Tim Urban- Some Goo Goo Dolls Song “Better Days”

I have just one question: Why is Tim still here?
His lower register is no good, in my opinion. The best thing going for Tim is his hair, and I’m not even saying that bc I like it, just that every girl 12 years old and younger does.
I honestly think (hope!) this is the last we see of Tim.

He sang that song like he was member of the Polyfonic Spree…and none of the other members bothered to show up.

Tim shook his head at Ellen’s very odd soup metaphor

Aaron Kelly- I Believe I Can Fly
Going into this, I can tell this is going to be really good, or a really big let down. No room for “in between.”
Aaron has poofy Randy Travis hair tonight. And he’s doing the “Pee Pee Dance” while he sings. That teetering back and forth from foot to foot is exactly what my brother did when he was three and was trying to convince my mom he wasn’t going to make it much longer waiting for her in line at the bank. Had Aaron done what my brother did that day- dropped his pants right in the bank lobby- it might have garnered him a few more votes tonight.
Dear 6 lb. 7 oz. newborn baby Jesus….please tell me the judges are not going to like this. It was not great. This falls into the “really big let-down” category for me.

Even with an extra hour and the ability to stop the tape….I can’t come up with anything better than that last paragraph.

And yet, the judges are liking it. Ewww. Except for Simon…he’s being a bit real.

Aaron has reached his level of incompendence.

Siobhan Magnus- When You Believe

Alicia Keys said “money shot?” OHHHH Money “spot”

It really means something to me when an artist such as Alicia Keys mentions she’s impressed with Siobhan.
Siobhan….quit P-popping in the microphone, please and thank you.
I don’t like this song, BTW, but I love Siobhan. Hey, how did she train those butterflies to sit so still on her through this song?

It sure was pretty…and made me sleepy.

I do have to agree with Simon’s opinion that the arrangement sounded a bit old fashioned.

Siobhan and Crystal have got to be, hands-down, the best respondents in AI history. They give such honest, heart-felt responses to the judges, without sounding smart-mouthy or smarmy.

Lilly’s amazing modern version of that inspirational classic, “Sixteen Tons” was amazing. I agree with Simon that the rest of the season a Crystal, Siobhan, Lilly” three-way…

race, RACE, — what were you thinking?

Mike Lynche- Hero
America, please listen to Cara and Simon tonight when you vote. I’m ready for him to go home. Right After Tim.

I thought he was going to sing “Billy, Don’t be a Hero”…that would have been better

I rewound the tape and listened to Lilly again

Crystal Bowersox closes out the show sans guitar- People Get Ready

Finally an inspirational song

Not only is she without a guitar, Crystal is starting this song a capella. Nice!
Holy crap…Crystal BROKE DOWN crying. She almost made me cry.

Randy gave her a standing ovation

Simon “That was inspirational He could have stopped there.

Crystal’s emotion was in seeing her dad.

Since we’re narrowing the contestants, I’m just going to pick a bottom two tonight: Tim Urban and Big Mike.

Bottom Two: Aaron & Tim…with Tim going home.

photo credit: nycla9

Chuck: Who is Justin Gaston?

Lorrie: No idea. It still irks me that last year’s loser is this year’s mentor.

Chuck: I see Ricky Minor is going to the Jay Leno show….

Lorrie: Really? Hadn’t heard that.

9:04 PM

Chuck: Medley of Elvis “Classics”

This is from the Elvis Lame vegas Years

9:05 PM

Lorrie: If I was of AI contestant age, and could sing, and made it through to the Top 12, I would REFUSE to perform in these cheesy Ford commercials and medley performances.

Chuck: Hell, Elvis sounds good compared to this lame medley

Lorrie: Are you trying to set me off within the first 5 min. of the show?

9:06 PM

Chuck: I’m surprised it’s taking this long. I must be having an off night

JESUS…is the director on drugs?

Mike dipped Crystal? She’s pregnant!

9:07 PM

Lorrie: I missed it!

9:08 PM

Chuck: You also missed that great shot of the floor…and the out of focus one of Crystal looking at her feet to make sure she didn’t trip…and the

one…well…you see

Or didn’t in this case

Lorrie: After Crystal has her baby and gets some ching in her pocket as a result of AI, I hope she goes to a dentist and gets dental implants to fix those gaps

in her teeth.

9:09 PM

Chuck: Lauren Hutton made a career out of gap teeth

9:10 PM

Lorrie: The gap in the front is different. Lauren wasn’t missing teeth. Crystal has congenitally missing cuspids or bicuspids. I can’t tell which without closer

examination.

Chuck: You really are a writer who wants to be a dentist.

9:11 PM

Lorrie: No, I just want to play one in chat rooms.

Chuck: I think trees in the middle of the lanes is not following traffic code.

9:12 PM

Where was Crystal in the Ford video?

Casey is safe

Lorrie: Ryan says we can find out how to drive an AI-inspired Ford Fiesta?! No thanks, I’ll ride a bike. You couldn’t pay me to drive a Fiesta.

9:13 PM

I think Crystal had a prenatal exam on commercial filming day. She had a doctor’s note that enabled her to miss the event.

Chuck: Casey looks like Yao Ming

next to Andrew and aaron

Lorrie: lol

Chuck: Stop asking questions Ryan

9:14 PM

Wow. Named Andrew fast.

Lorrie: I called it!

Chuck: that was quick

I think we both called it.

Lorrie: Yeah, but mostly it’s all about me.

Chuck: He should have sung Straight Up

9:15 PM

Lorrie: Hell yeah! What gives?

9:16 PM

Chuck: I think he should say “You people clapping your hands? You killed my career with that insane clapping!”

Lorrie: Do you notice Andrew is wearing a bow tie that is the same pattern as his shirt?!

And who is the Asian Grace Jones they keep cutting to in the audience?

9:17 PM

Chuck: His wife.

Lorrie: And how is it that I slip in two Grace Jones references this week?

Chuck: I don’t believe you know Grace Jones

9:18 PM

Lorrie: waddya mean?

Chuck: You’re too young to remember Grace Jones.

9:19 PM

Lorrie: No I’m not, obviously. I think I even watched her perform on Solid Gold.

9:20 PM

Chuck: Solid Gold? Wow, you’re old.

9:21 PM

Lorrie: And speaking of Solid Gold, I would like to take this moment to let the world know that my huntin’, fishin’, beer-drinkin’, 4×4 truck drivin’ lineman

brother wanted to be a Solid Gold dancer when he was 7 years old.

9:22 PM

Chuck: Do we need to add his name to make sure this shows up in Google searches for his name?

Lorrie: hahahaha!

9:23 PM

Elliott Yamin is showing his Africa video. He’s another one who’s had dental work done since AI.

See? AI is good for oral health.

9:24 PM

Chuck: They could have saved on the private plane for those two…used a reg flight to take a whole work crew to build that dorm in a week.

9:26 PM

Lorrie: Oh no.. Annie Lennox is going to be on Idol Gives Back again? She wasn’t very good the last time she was on. And I LOVE Annie

Chuck: That’s the second Annie Lennox. She pulled a Paul McCartney

Lorrie: Brooke White is going to stop singing in a second and ask the band to start over.

Chuck:

9:27 PM

She’s going to look over at Crystal and whisper “Run, run while you can!”

Lorrie: and then she’s going to find Didi in the audience and be like “Quit tryin’ to be me, beeeotch!”

9:28 PM

Chuck: lol

I’m just glad Lilly’s perfect version of Burning Love saved her with Aaron & Casey.

9:29 PM

And Lorrie left rather than listen to Brooke white and some guy from the web

9:30 PM

Lorrie is still offline. This isn’t fair. I have to watch Adam lamberty scream through another song?

9:32 PM

she’s back!

Lorrie: Whew! Where am I? What year is it? Who’s the president?

Chuck: The President is Me!

Lorrie: Oh lord…

Chuck: It’s a paradise for all.

9:34 PM

Aaron looks like he’s going to cry.

Tim automatically looks to sit in the Bottom 3 chair

Lorrie: As well he should!

9:35 PM

Chuck: Lee is safe

Lorrie: Shut up, Lee. Don’t ruin it for yourself.

Chuck: Shiobhan is safe

Katie is safe

9:36 PM

Lorrie: Did Katie not put on makeup tonight?

Who’s that big guy everyone is screaming over?

Chuck: Ricky Minor?

9:37 PM

Lorrie: Dude, Ricky has been pumping iron….and eating like, half a cow or something.

Chuck: It’s working.

Is it Tim?

Please, oh please

Lorrie: Yes, please let it be.

9:38 PM

“zero to hero” is such a lame comment.

Chuck: Crystal pulled out a harmonica?

Lorrie: haha…you beat me to it.

Chuck: Lee is safe

9:39 PM

Big Rick is pissed

I feel sorry for Tim if Mike is told he’s out.

9:42 PM

What song is this? on the BK commercial?

Yoo Hoo? Is anybody?

9:43 PM
Lorrie left rather than listen to Adam Lambert

Lorrie: I had to go brush my teeth.

9:44 PM

Chuck: Oh, jeez, I don’t want to go listen to inspirational songs next week.

Lorrie: But that was stupid, because Adam’s performance is likely to make me throw up in my mouth.

Chuck: Is Adam going to perform ***** with his backup dancer again?

9:45 PM

Lorrie: lol

Chuck: I will tell you what I want from you Adam…but I doubt you can go that far away.

Lorrie: Ditto.

9:46 PM

Chuck: What year did Elvis release this song?

Lorrie: Alright…those are fighting words.

Chuck: He looks like he’s wearing one of the King’s suits.

9:47 PM

Or one Liberace wore. I could never tell the difference between their outfits.

Lorrie: Did you just see the glitter earplugs in his ears?

9:48 PM

Chuck: I saw those long ago. Thought it was another Elvis reference, but I thought if I wrote that you’d hop on your bike and come after me.

By the way…I am not typing from home tonight.

9:49 PM

Lorrie: Adam’s hair reminds me of The Frightened Family on SNL.

Chuck: That must be a skit from after 1980.

The year SNL died.

9:50 PM

Lorrie: Here it is: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FUpiEfzaX9M

Chuck: Look at Tim. He is seriously ready to run if they call Mike’s name.

9:51 PM

Lorrie: did my connection go away again?

9:52 PM

Chuck: No. I was watching your clip. That wasn’t SNL. That was an 80s comedy show with talent.

9:53 PM

Lorrie: Hmmmm. I thought it was on SNL, too. I don’t even remember The New Show.

9:54 PM

Chuck: Katie is safe.

Lorrie: I hate the way that big guy stands on the stage.

Chuck: TIM??????

Lorrie: JEEZ!!! Another week of that little twerp?!

Chuck: Run Katie. Run

9:55 PM

Chuck: Katie is out.

Lorrie: It’s Katie.

Chuck: When he said “the other person was not in the bottom 3″ you knew it was Katie who was out. Big Mike would have gotten a big bost from his near miss.

Lorrie: Well, it had to happen some time.

9:56 PM

Chuck: Ryan said she grew up quickly. I heard she’s got a $300 a day habit.

Shoes. Shoes. You weirdos.

Lorrie: In the fall, she’ll be appearing on Celebrity Rehab with Dr. Drew.

9:57 PM

Chuck: The sequel: Celeb Rehab with Stacy & Clinton

Lorrie: Crystal just covered her mouth on that closeup so I couldn’t check her teeth. She’s a sneaky thing!

Chuck: There are 5 guys and 2 females left and this was the year of the female idol?

9:58 PM

Lorrie: Well, it only takes one to win.

10:00 PM

I can’t remember if I said this last night, but I’ve been giving the results a lot of thought. I think Crystal and Siobhan will be better off if they DON’T win. I’m

starting to think that Lee should win this competition and Crystal and Siobhan will still get record deals and will have success of Daughtry and Clay Aiken

proportions.

Chuck: True

Chuck: But when either of them leave the show we’ll have to find someone new for you to chat with

10:01 PM

Lorrie: I was typing that book of the Bible and missed it- did they announce next week’s theme?

Inspirational songs

Lorrie: you can’t be a quitter when either of them leaves. Besides, I thought you were staying put as long as Tim left before them.

10:02 PM

Chuck: No, they must finish in the top two or my evil twin starts doing the chat

Lorrie: OK, fair enough. You getting ready to post this?

photo credit: bslavinator