Needless to say, I wanted to write about anything but the obvious topic for this week. At first I thought it might be because I have been hearing Christmas carols this year since before Thanksgiving and seeing pictures of Santa Claus in stores and on commercials this year before people even put away their Halloween costumes.
One of the funnier scenes I saw this year was at a Walgreens which had half a row of Halloween toys making ghost sounds with screaming dolls and just one shelf below was a little snowman popping out of a hat singing “thumpiti thumpi thump, thumpiti thump thump”! The combined sounds kind of summed up my feels of the impending holidays.
It is funny to think how cynical I, and so many of my friends, have become about the holiday season. When I first hear Christmas music each year, it fills me with the same joy as the first snow of the year. The problem, of course, is that the snow becomes slush or piles you have to move, and the music becomes repetitive and superficial.
One of my friends, Mike, this last week pointed as he pounded another shot at the bar, “They’re so happy in those Christmas songs. Who can live up to that?”
This is probably the same reason my exercise at the Homeless Prayer Support Group this last week almost bombed on me. I had asked the group to draw on a blank piece of paper their favorite Christmas tradition growing up.
To try to engage the group, I went as far as to tell them my exciting Christmas traditions while growing up. The 3:00 Christmas Eve children’s service, which led to dinner at my grandmother’s and then a 7:00 family service. We opened one side of the family’s presents and then finally went to an 11:00 candlelight service before we went to bed to wait for Santa. At 6:00 AM we were up for presents at home, and at 12:00 we went to Great Grandma’s for the family we only saw once a year! That was pretty much it, year in, year out for most of my childhood.
Though there were a couple of nice pictures at the group table, there was a large majority that either blew off the topic or even became aggressively obligatory about the whole idea of stirring up old family wounds. Allowing the group to take the discussion where it needed to go, we broke into a discussion about people’s memories of watching other people always enjoy Christmas each year.
One woman talked about her absent and sometimes abusive father. A guy in the group had drawn a picture of the toys he used to get– under the tree– growing up, but then had a tear in his eye over the fact that he could not provide the same for his own family.
The group talked about the expectations of their children and the fact that they were living in a shelter. It was a good reminder to me that we could give people all the toys and meals we wanted to over the holidays, but if we couldn”t give them the gift of self respect and dignity, we were “only a banging gong”.
I once had a guy in a counseling session tell me that the expectation of Christmas is like the expectation of cocaine. You are always trying relive the experience of your first time!
The question of course is –how do any of us live up to the Hallmark music and expectations of the Christmas we think we are supposed to be living? I might suggest we do it by shifting our intentions and expectations over what Christmas is supposed to be.
We need to reclaim the Christmas message of Peace on Earth and Good Will to Men!– Shifting the intention of our cards and music from trying to relive traditions to rejoicing in what is.
Hear me out— turning our Christmas attention from a time of fulfilling people’s desires and expectations, to a time of thanksgiving and praise for people, places and things that we have already received. Christmas can be a moment of attentiveness to that around us that God has already spoken through.
The shelter families do not need to shower their children with gifts for Christmas. They need to shower them with praise and thanksgiving for being gifts of God. By reshifting our Christmas intention from what we think the world expects us to do or be, to what God has already done for us — in both his Son– and the people around us, we can once again sing “Joy to the World, the Lord Has Come!”
This takes the angel’s words in the Christmas narrative “be not afraid” to both Mary and Joseph to a whole new message for us. “Do not be afraid” of what has been, what could be or the expectations of this world. “I have brought you good news of great joy that will be for all the people” (Luke 2:10)
This Christmas, who do you need to thank for being the voice of hope? How can we make Christmas more about thanks and praise for those who have been the voice, hand and space of God?
“…what is conceived in her is from the Holy Spirit. She will give birth to a son, and you are to give him the name Jesus, because he will save his people from their sins.” Matt 1:20-21
Bio: Chris Craig received his Master’s in Social Work from Tulane University and his Master’s in Pastoral Care & Counseling from Garrett Seminary. Chris guest preaches, leads spirituality classes, and works in social services in Lakeland. Chris is not ordained in any church, and his columns do not speak for any churches or organizations where he might be affiliated.
Cliff Wheeler
2 months ago
Very well stated, Craig. Thank you. We truly must meditate on the MIRACLE of Christmas and come to believe it in our own individual hearts before we can begin to convey that joy to others. To think that the Creator of the universe came to man out of mercy , to lower Himself to the status of the ultimate dependency of a newborn in the arms of an inexperienced teenager and poor carpenter “father”, to grow up as an exile, to return under threat of the most vicious of rulers, to boldly carry out His true Father’s plan, and to accept a fate that we can’t imagine, to bear the weight of every man’s sin, to be rejected by His Father, to lose all hope as no man truly has experienced, but to rise again for our sake. This is truly the reason there is joy in this time of celebration. If we can just get over the idea that we are owed something special at this time of year or that something more is expected of us at this time of year. If we could just take the time to realize we have been offered the most wonderful gift we could ever hope for—the security not of just hope,but of a promise. And with that gift bestowed upon us there is the ability to extend our love to others and to give them the basics of dignity, companionship, kindness without a price tag (at least not monetarily required). We may not be able to excape the secularity of the season and it’s burdens, but we can take on the joy of the reality that has occured in the greatest miracle known to man—God with us(“Emanuel”)